Introduction: I’m Asian-American, first generation, grew up low-income. My career has been focused on financial wellness and wealth building for low-income communities. I’ve learned alot about finances, but not sure I would’ve sought out the same info at such depth if work wasn't the catalyst.
SECTION ONE: ASSETS AND DEBT
Net Worth: -$2,100
Retirement: $39,000. Before my Master’s, balance was ~$50k, accumulated in 3 years post college. Maxed out Roth IRA and 401k for 2 of those years.
Equity: None. My partner K bought a house for us recently, still under his name only.
Savings Accounts: $650
Checking Accounts: $250
Credit Card Debt: $0
Student Loan Debt: $42,000. $22k federal, $20k owed to siblings.
College: No debt, thanks to a full-ride scholarship I won. I had part-time jobs and spent most of my money on clothes. My brother sent me $1000 every year, and other siblings gifted me money during holidays.
Grad school: All my current debt. I dumped savings and some retirement funds into tuition. Even with a scholarship of $20k/year, I had to borrow 40k. Professional school is expensive, y’all. I had part-time jobs, and all earnings went to living expenses.
Other Debt: $0
Inheritance: Me - none.
Partner – The house down payment was a gift from his parents. He’ll also get a significant inheritance from eventually. His parents grew up poor but aren't anymore, and have always been frugal. The life his parents gave him is what I’d like to give my kids if I have them: set them up well without spoiling.
My parents worked so hard to support my family. When I tried to give them my paychecks in high school, they told me to keep them for myself. When I bought gifts for them during holidays, they told me I should spend for myself. My siblings (including me) who spent the most time in the US, and thus could benefit the most long-term, are all financially stable. My older siblings still struggle and won’t accept help. I remember all the time how lucky I am to have a supportive family.
Other Related:
Before March, I lived in a 2 bed apartment in a big city with a roommate. I planned to visit K for Spring Break but moved in with him instead due to quarantine. We intended for this to happen after my graduation, but the timeline was sped up. We never shared finances before but now he was taking care of all our living expenses. K didn’t mind and was happy to. I wouldn’t have cared if our situations were flipped. But I felt guilty having someone else pay so much for me. And for so long I was a strong, independent woman and it felt like I was giving up some of that.
But I realized that we are partners in many ways, including this. We try to make life easier for each other, and K was doing that for me just as I do for him. Besides, my independence was enabled by the safety net of my family. I aim to provide the same for K, for my nephews/nieces, and for my kids if I have them – and I certainly won’t consider them “less independent” for taking those opportunities. Seriously, this has been a main point of my whole career! Gotta apply it to myself.
Partner’s Net Worth: $200,000+
SECTION TWO: INCOME
Income Progression: I was an English and Classics major who had tried some teaching and considered law school. I really blossomed skills-wise at my first post-college job, and learned so much from many wonderful people. Also, the nonprofit field allows me to be a jack of all trades due to their funding constraints. Turns out I’m a master of none, and that's okay (;
2015 - $15,000 for 10-month term
2016 - $48,000 annual, promotion
2017 - $52,000 annual, promotion
Start grad school
2018 - $40/hour, consultant
2019 - picked up $20/hr for university
End grad school
2020 - $65,000 annual, strategy-related role
After graduation this year I was unemployed for 3 months. In August my current employer offered me a short-term, full-time position and hope to keep me long-term. Crossing my fingers, as I’m very inspired by their mission and impact. Regarding salary, if I stayed in/gone back to expensive cities, I would’ve sought a higher range. I’m now in a low COL town so adjusted accordingly.
Monthly Take Home: $4,481. Taxes taken out, no benefits.
Partner’s Monthly Take Home: ~$7,000. Deductions for health insurance (for both of us), 401k, HSA, all that jazz. This has been his salary for 2 years. Before this, a grad school stipend (~$35k) for many years.
SECTION THREE: MONTHLY EXPENSES
Our finances are joint now and we consult each other on buys at $100+.
Mortgage: $700
Property Taxes: $800
Home & Car Insurance: $45
Savings & Investment: Whatever’s left after expenses.
Debt Payments: $0. I'll funnel all my earnings into this (after Roth IRA). But it won’t be enough before the grace period expires and interest is capitalized on my federal loans. Anything left owed to the feds will be covered by K’s savings and paid off before 2021. Then I’ll focus on paying my siblings back.
Donations: $625
Gas/Electric/Heat: Unknown, these bills are lying around somewhere.
Trash: $15
Wifi: $50
Phone: $0. K is on a family plan, and I’m on one with my siblings.
Groceries: $600 average
Subscriptions: Amazon Prime $10. Netflix and Hulu 0, using family plans. Google Play Music Family $15.
Gym Membership: $60 for K's membership. Will get mine once we’re comfortable going again.
Pet: Unknown, haven't summed up all the cat things.
Miscellaneous (eating out, hobbies, gifts, random purchases, etc.): $200 average
SECTION FOUR: THE DIARY
Day 1, Sunday
8:45 am After waking up and going back to sleep a few times, I finally just get up. I do my morning routine: wash face, brush teeth, take pill, contacts, ring, brush hair, moisturizer.
My partner K is playing with the kitty, and I join. We adopted her not long ago, so she’s still acclimating. K calls her a scaredy cat because she’s skittish about everything. She's now in her carrier, in catloaf position (paws tucked and hidden, so she looks like a bread loaf) and not budging.
9:20 I check on my plants and do some planty things. I decide I want crepes for breakfast, and defrost 2 leftovers in the oven. As I wait, I scan through old starred emails. One is from Chase, offering a complimentary Shoprunner one year membership. Why not? The website tells me I already have an account, of course. But I don’t know my password and have to reset. I’m hungry and will get back to this.
I eat the first crepe like normal but everything falls out, so the 2nd gets the pancake treatment. With apples and maple syrup, they’re delicious.
Shoprunner finally works. I haven’t been spending much online, but if I do I’ll get free shipping (I never buy online without it).
12:00 pm We eat defrosted pizza for lunch. We’ve been watching Brooklyn 99 during meals, but today we watch Adventure Time. I give him my crusts as usual, since I don’t like them. Afterwards, K asks me to crack his back by standing on it. I manage to do so without totally breaking his back. Then I putz around while he packs for a work trip. I make him coffee and give him his daily portion of cookies (he asked me to hide and portion them). K leaves to finish up work at his office. I play Tetris on the Switch.
4:15 I take a shower. Fall weather hit one day last week with zero transition, and it’s been much cooler since, and the toasty water is so nice. K gets home and finishes packing. We drive out to his company lot so he can get the rental car. We hug goodbye. It feels like our long distance days again ); I've gotten very used to seeing him all day every day thanks to quarantine. He calls me before I get home - his car wasn’t delivered due to some miscommunication, so I have to drop him off at the rental center.
7:40 I feed the kitty and finally start cooking. I make pork chops seared in a cast iron pan, finished in the oven. I flavor it with salt, pepper, thyme, coriander, dill, and sage. I love cooking and being able to experiment so much. Sometimes it turn out a bit funny but hey, that's how I learn. I eat a pork chop with leftover jasmine rice.
My favorite Youtube channel has a new video. I don’t follow many but enjoy Safiya Nygaard’s content so much. The new one is about acrylic pour art. I think I'd feel bad about all the paint, but the finished pieces look so cool! I actually like her “bad attempts” more. I should try acrylics; I've mostly used watercolors but might be missing out on a medium I'll like.
9:30 K texts that he’s reached the hotel. It’s not that long a road trip and unlikely anything bad will happen, but I still worry. I’m glad he arrived okay.
9:45 I cut my fingernails. They grow like weeds, so I snip them every week otherwise they poke my eyeballs when removing contacts. I play Hearthstone on my phone during this. Then bedtime. My nightly routine: brush teeth, mouthwash, rotate fittonia plant, ring off, contacts out, lip balm, lotion.
11:30 Okay, I’m still awake, browsing online. I set my alarm for 7:30 am and sleep.
Total $0
Day 2, Monday
7:30 am Alarm wakes me. Snooze. Alarm again. I get up and feed the cat.
7:55 I put on a work outfit: green pleated maxi skirt and a mint green top with an orange, pink, and green floral pattern. Pink cardigan too since the office is cool.
My style is the most "feminine" and "loud" at this office - lots of colors and patterns, and silhouettes that are stereotypically feminine. Sometimes I wonder if I should tone myself down. Whether people might take me more seriously professionally if I wore more pants, muted colors and patterns. But this is what I enjoy, and if people underestimate me based on how I dress, that's on them, not me. I'm fortunate that previous coworkers have shown confidence in my abilities (even when I had little confidence) that I never had to "tone down” myself to get more respect.
8:00 Pack for work using a swag bag they gave me, which I know is cheesy but fits all my things well. Grab Greek yogurt and spoon for breakfast. I need to attach a voided check to my direct deposit form, so I add that. Got badge and mask. Mist my maranta. Shoes on – I pick Sketchers since my maxi will hide them mostly. But no one will notice my shoes, per the wise words of Gustav in Ever After!
8:10 While backing out, I spot trash bags on my neighbors' curbs - it's trash day. Usually my partner takes out the trash, so I debate waiting until next week. Then I tell myself the trash will get gross and stinky, even if in plastic bags, and also to be an adult. I roll the can to the curb. Upon arrival at work, I find a parking spot where I don't have to back up to get out. I'm always paranoid about hitting things/people, even with plenty of lot space. I haven't actually hit anything/one (that I know of) but still.
8:40 My coworker responds about the office book club. They've been reading White Fragility. I stop by her office and get the book, yay! The group is meeting again next week so I need to catch up. I then eat my yogurt. As my boss walks by me, she compliments my skirt (:
10:00 Meeting with boss and person she's been waiting to chat with for awhile, via phone. Person is shocked and unhappy at our update, and ends the call fast. Me and boss chat about a realization I had this morning, that will likely change one of the main things we want to do for my project. Whether this is a good thing or not is TBD. I go refill my tea at the hot water dispenser, so far away at the other end of the office. Note to self: bring own mug and stop hogging this office one. Then I find a thing that could be a big breakthough, maybe. If other things go a certain way, perhaps.
11:45 I head out. I'm doing half days remote because I don't feel like prepping lunches to bring. Also I feel bad about leaving kitty alone all day (dunno if she cares). It's sunny but chilly outside. I'll definitely want all remote when it gets colder.
12:00 pm Wegman’s pit stop. They stock new plants every week or so. I debate a cute succulent for $5, but as I put it down, accidentally brush against a leaf and break it. Now I have to get it! I also buy a huge cat grass for $4, to distract kitty from eating my ponytail palm.
12:20 I drop into a local flower shop for the first plant I’ve ever ordered, a rattlesnake calathea. So pretty (: There are more leaves than expected for this size pot and price. This florist sells small plants for only $5 and take orders. (Very dangerous, but I limited myself to one plant...for now.)
Going home, I have to do a loop because the main road has one-way sections, arg. I think I have a lot of driving anxiety, probably because I spent 8 years using mostly public transportation and walking.
12:35 Instant ramen and diet grapefruit soda for lunch, classic adult meal. I think that the best standard brand is Mama ramen, and my favorite flavor is the creamy shrimp tom yum. The best spicy ramen are the Samyang spicy chicken ones. I usually add dried seaweed, but not feeling it today.
I later set up work in our office room. It’s so nice to have my own desk. I was using K’s since he no longer works from home, but prefer mine with my own pictures and knick-knacks, like my squishy stress bunny. I try to access files through remote desktop but can’t. IT puts me on hold. Is it worth driving back into work? Now the line tells me to leave a voicemail; I do, but I’d rather just keep holding.
2:55 An IT person calls me back. As I’m telling him what’s wrong, I realize I never logged into remote VPN, so of course I had no access. I apologize to him, feeling bad I wasted his time. This must be like the jokes about people not plugging things in yet expecting them to work. IT sends an email saying the ticket was resolved. My silliness is documented for eternity.
Meat stick (prosciutto-wrapped mozzarella) for consolation. Back to work, more munchies so I eat an apple too.
5:40 K and I chat and agree to play Don’t Starve Together later, which we started a few days ago. Dinner is pork chop, rice, defrosted mixed veggies. My friend and I talk over the phone as I eat. We grew up in the same hometown, and she's been my bestie for a long time. I can’t recall a time when we weren’t friends! (She does - when we were very young. I just have bad memory.) She’s recently had very exciting things happen, and I love hearing her life updates. She's one of few friends I'm close enough with that we speak very candidly about everything.
7:30 Kitty joins me on the living room couch. Her sudden epiphany: she can knead my blanket, and does for a long time. I pet her while she kneads. Then dinner for the cat. I also check on my new plants and water them.
As I go outside to repot a plant, I see a small package on the porch. Addressed from a friend and labeled "fragile". It’s a ring dish! So lovely and thoughtful, and I was just thinking about getting one. I text my friend many thanks and place it in the bathroom.
8:40 K and I play Don’t Starve Together on our computers. About 5 minutes in, we’re suddenly attacked by scary dogs and I die ): I’m a ghostie for awhile as he attempts to revive me, but it’s a struggle. We decide to play Stardew Valley next time, since this game more difficult than we thought it’d be. I play Animal Crossing afterwards. A new neighbor moved in, a cute koala named Alice!
11:30 Okay, time for bed. Ugh, I keep browsing instead of sleeping.
Total $15.10
Day 3, Tuesday
8:00 am Alarm goes off. I push snooze. Then I remember kitty is waiting for food, so instead get up and feed her. I eat yogurt and get work started.
9:50 Break time! I drive to the Habitat for Humanity ReStore nearby. I haven’t gone in the past two weeks, but we got some amazing furniture deals here. Like our beautiful 10x13 living room rug for only $50. The thrift stores around here have actual thrift store prices. Our friends recently got a coffee table from here that was exactly what we're looking for. I’m happy they got it but also kind of jealous.
I find a pretty glazed square saucer ($0.50, plus another 25% off), an adorable panda mug ($1.00), and a mug painted with a lovely floral pattern ($0.50) but a chip on the lip. Doesn’t matter since these mugs will be pots.
10:40: Home and work, more research on how to do all the things. I get a meat stick and prep ramen. I am so cold‼ I wrap our living room blanket around me like a shawl. This was an Amazon gift last year from K. He searched “softest blanket” and said everyone recommended this one. It is indeed incredibly soft, and I love it so much. I’m shall walk around and sit like this. Thermostat says it’s 64 degrees. Hmm, maybe my body is just rebelling against adapting to lower temps.
12:40 I finally eat lunch. I got distracted by work. The ramen warms me up some, but my fingers and feet are still cold. It’s far too early for me to break out mittens, right? My new succulent’s plastic pot fits perfectly into the flower mug. Panda mug is less of a home run; it’s a large sphere but the opening is just a bit too small. I’ll just repot another plant directly into it. I replace the dining plate under the grass with the square saucer. I check my money tree. I tend to ignore it, as it does pretty well left alone. Its new leaves got so big!
1:30 I use Teams chat for the first time. A colleague tells me some people who received my earlier mass email were confused about a certain line and emailed her assuming a more positive future outcome. I send out a clarifying email that the news is indeed as bad as it sounds...and people are not happy about that now. I just feel guilty I can’t make things better.
4:00 The itchy bumps on my finger are multiplying. I have some isolated eczema. Years ago, it was all over my hand and severe, but with medication slowly receded and now pops up in small spots. A similar bump on my leg that keeps coming back (only when I scratch it…I know, I know). I put on medicated ointment.
4:20 Someone replied all to my clarification email, pointedly questioning our decisions. Yikes! I ponder how to respond, then decide to do that tomorrow instead, when I can fully refrain from being snarky.
I go repot my haworthia into the panda mug, which should be the last time I repot her. I’m doing this out on the porch, squatting over pots with a spoon and bag of dirt, and wonder if people are judging me. Another package out here, from my hometown friend. It says Edible Arrangements, ooh. K calls me as I start opening it, so I narrate the process for him. It’s strawberries dipped in chocolate! I eat one right away, so yummy. I text my friend thanks and eat more. Must save some, reluctantly, for K.
6:00 I do some clean up. I’ve been leaving dishes, wrappers, and such strewn about. Without K here, I’m less prompt because no one can see my shame. Mini brush to sweep crumbs and such off counters, then regular broom for the kitchen floor because I made it messy in just 2 days.
The cat is eating the grass!
6:30 I consider exercising. We made sandbags with contractor bags and lawn pebbles, but I'm not workouts. Before quarantine, I went to the gym 3x a week (starting last Sept) even in bitter winter. I really enjoyed feeling myself get stronger. Now I’m not nearly as disciplined. My partner is much better about it, even doing cardio in between lifting days. Maybe I’ll work out tomorrow.
Instead, I wash rice and Instant Pot it for dinner, then take a shower. I feel so warm afterwards! I’m determined to keep myself that way.
7:00 The cat joins me on the couch for some blanket kneading. She does her bass purr, which disturbed me when I first heard it because it was so strange and so deep that I thought it might be a distress sound. I hear it during pets, and sometimes she’ll sit far away from us and just rumble like that. Eventually dinner time for kitty, then for me. I eat a pork chop with rice and leftover mixed veggies. I put the rice in the fridge! I forgot several times and had to throw it away the next day. I know rice is cheap, but I hate wasting food like that. Some Animal Crossing after. One of my neighbors is moving out tomorrow :(
11:35 It’s so late. I do my nightly routine and go to bed.
Total $2.02
Day 3, Wednesday
8:15 am I finally get up and go through my morning routine. Putting on my ring is easier to remember when it’s out on a dish instead of hidden in a crowded basket. I feed kitty and start work. My boss responded to the reply all email yesterday evening. Whew! I do think that was better coming from her instead of me the newbie.
9:00 I look up how to access someone else’s calendar on Outlook, because I need to see my bosses’ schedule. Microsoft’s directions seem to apply to the online version, and other search results match it. I click around Outlook instead, and figure it out that way. I mist my prayer plant and eat a yogurt.
9:50 To the ReStore. I go in and out of the house 3 times because I forgot my keys, donation box, and phone. Rihanna's Skin comes on from my playlist as I drive. Yeees, I haven't heard this in a while and sing along enthusiastically.
I find 4 ramekins for $2.00. This will complete the set I picked up here before. K wants them for baking but doesn’t think he’d use them enough to justify a new set. I also nab a ceramic thing made for an unknown purpose ($0.50), to be a nice small pot.
10:35 Home, shrouded in the blanket as I type up research. Ramen again for lunch. I could bring it into work, but then my coworkers might judge and/or pity me for eating like a college student.
12:40 pm I get dressed for the office. Weather app says it's 70s outside, so I put on a light pink maxi skirt with a geometric pattern, a light orange/coral top with a floral print, and teal cardigan. I end up walking instead of driving since it's nice out. I immediately feel happier and refreshed! I think I’ve been grumpy from feeling so cold in the house. Like hangry, except…crumpy.
1:00 A sign outside a bakery says today’s special is carrot cake cupcake. Nooooo, I love carrot cake but I’m trying not to buy treats. But this bakery has such good cupcakes…I go in and buy one for $3.00. It’s difficult to resist these when they’re so cheap compared to prices in larger cities. I eat the cupcake at work and it is the perfect dessert.
1:50 The internet stops functioning as I'm writing up a form online to submit ): Instead, I call someone to break the bad news to since there's no email listed for them. I really dislike calling people I’ve never met, since I rely so much on expressions and body language. Several tea treks this afternoon.
4:00 I text a friend about helping me lift a dresser out of the garage later. I bought a lovely wood dresser for $150 from FB last month to replace our current dinky one, but it needs TLC. I’ve been procrastinating hard but am afraid this is the last week of nice weather, so want to fix it up now. Plus it can be a nice surprise for K.
4:30 As I’m leaving, some coworkers chat to me! I’m so happy – I’m a shy person at work, mostly because I feel like I have to absorb all the info possible and then I can start to say things, otherwise I’ll make a fool of myself. This shouldn't apply to general chatter, but somehow does for me. It’s really nice talking to them.
5:00 At home, NY driver’s license came in the mail. I feel so official now! Except, this isn’t a REAL ID and I thought I was getting one. The NY webpage says to bring more documents to the DMV for one one. I guess since I won’t be flying soon, not a big deal. And I can always use a passport, though I dislike carrying that unless really needed.
5:35 My friend comes over and we carry the dresser from the garage to the driveway. He points out that some of the backing is reinforced with staples (???) instead of nails. Ah well, this was cheap. I start off by sanding edges where the veneer is scratched or started to peel; harder to do precisely than videos show. Then a long, long time putting wood filler in those spots. It’s hard getting it to stick without bits falling off. Okay, not so sure how well this will turn out :/ I leave it to dry overnight, so tomorrow I can stain
7:00 After a hot shower, I put on my workout leggings that have a fleece lining. Not to workout, just for the warmth. Desperate times! I know that after winter, these temps will feel like beach weather. But right now I’m cold. I go feed the kitty. Then I remember I was supposed to send a form for work and do so, so very late :(
8:00 Dinner. Pork chop, leftover rice, defrosted corn. K and I chat as I eat. We call it a night early though. I finally get the dishwasher going; I left so many dirty dishes sitting around this week. I play Animal Crossing. I search for a new neighbor and pick the first one on a mystery island, a horse named Papi. He really likes nature, so I feel we’ll jive there.
9:00 A couple of friends text yes for a group video call next week. We know each other from grad school but are all in different states now. Many things have been happening for everyone, so I’m excited to toast to them!
10:00 I actually want to go up to bed this time, but the kitty is snuggled next to me. I’ve been petting her for at least 30 mins. But finally we go upstairs for the night. I scroll through subreddits before sleeping.
Total $5.94
Day 4, Thursday
7:45 I get up and do morning stuff, then feed the cat. I try to turn on my work computer but it does nothing until I charge it. Yogurt for breakfast, then burrito myself in the blanket for work.
9:50 ReStore break. I accidentally walk out in flip flops instead of sneakers but am too lazy to switch. Oh well, I’ll be that person in socks and sandals.
At the store, I immediately grab these beautiful blue glazed pots, labeled $4 for the set. There’s also a soft, pinkish white pillow. But it doesn’t fit colors I want for any room; nah, I’d regret it later. I find a pretty set of Japanese-style art, depicting varied pots and flowers. The frames are beat up though. I take a picture to send to K later to see if he likes them. But on my last circle about, the paintings have disappeared. That’s okay, someone else will enjoy them.
K might declare a pot moratorium when he gets home, as he’s threatened before. Hah, he’ll be using the car anyways so I can’t even go thrifting then.
10:55 Home and back to work. I get an email from Accounting that there’s a check for me. First one, woo! They told me it would be Thursdays, but I’m so used to Fridays that this was a surprise.
11:40 Hot ramen, mmm. While waiting for them to poof, I check my plants. I browse FB and subreddits while eating. Then upstairs to dress. Today, a navy and white triangle print blouse to pair with my black and white feather print pants. I also break out a nice pair of sneaker-like shoes, in grey suede.
1:45 Back in the office, many rounds of hot leaf juice. I pick up my paycheck, and Accounting confirms my next will be deposited. I also stop by HR to ask how I can set up Zoom meetings.
4:00 I drive to the credit union to deposit checks. They close too early, in my opinion. How do people who don’t have flexible workplaces find time to use them?
K recently added me to his account. My bank has no branch here, though I got them years ago specifically because they were national and I wanted access wherever I went in the US :/ I don’t like paying ATM fees, so K has been withdrawing cash if needed. I’m also not comfortable using a bank app out of paranoia that someone might steal my phone and siphon my account. I think my bank accounts and Social Security number are the only things the tech giants don’t have, so I guard them as my precious.
4:30 Home for more work in my blanket.
5:30 K and I chat. We decide to see if our friends are available for board games this weekend, and if not, watch a movie. I suddenly realize I didn’t defrost a protein for dinner, and even putting it out now won’t be enough time to unfreeze it. Nooo. I end our call to work on the dresser (but lie to him about why).
I put stain on a few samples of filler. I got it matched at a local hardware store, but not sure if the stain will look like its label image. Wait, the label says to leave the stain for 4-6 hours before using a 2nd coat…well, I can keep sanding. Except there's definitely too much wood filler on these spots, because I’m doing one corner for so long.
6:23 I go inside and eat leftover corn and a meat stick for dinner. I’m crumpy again. And sad this won't be done by the time K gets back. I decide to make a latte, likely a bad idea so late. But I want something cozy. I mix in cocoa powder and honey with it. We have a grinder, aeropress, and French press (for guests) but use Wegman’s beans and a cheap milk frother. Occasionally we get nicer beans at a local shop, and my partner eventually wants to upgrade to a real fancy grinder. The coffee set up captures well our spending habits.
7:00 The cat stole my half-eaten meat stick‼ She flees, but stops to eat her prize, so I snatch it from her clutches. K had asked me if she’d be unrecognizable when he gets back, and I think so. Very bold now. After I feed her, she goes downstairs and meows a lot. I will not be summoned, cat! XD I stay here until she’s back in the room, quiet, and then I go downstairs. I eat chocolate strawberries and browse FB and subreddits about plants, finances, and furnishing homes. I should read for the book club. Eh.
9:15 I find out online there’s Fall Festival on the main street on Saturday! I’m excited; I was visiting last year when it happened. There were hay bales and scarecrows and tractors and kids getting faces painted. I wasn’t sure they'd have it this year, but glad that local businesses will get a huge boost in sales.
I also remember we got a beautiful bouquet of dried flowers from there, now still our living room and only shed a bit during the year. Since they last for so long, I want a set for the guest bedroom.
9:30 I play Tetris. A couple of bad rounds, but I get 6th once! Pretty good. I cross some animals, and say hello to Papi. Then I go empty the rest of the dishwasher and load it again, and sweep up ramen bits. I don’t want all this to linger longer if I feel lazy tomorrow. K sometimes says, “Good job, past self!” out loud to acknowledge what he did in the past that make the present less stressful. I really like that, so now I try to approach things more that way.
11:25 I go to bed. But I have a throbbing caffeine headache, and my stomach feels hollow. Why did I do this to myself? I read some “messy” Money Diaries from the Drama Watch Roundup to tire out my brain. It takes a long time for me to fall asleep.
Total $4.32
Day 6, Friday
7:00 am I wake up needing to pee. Can't go back to sleep due to residual headache. I do my morning routine and feed the kitty. I have to boot up my work laptop. Its battery runs out so quickly; it’s a bit annoying that I won’t be able to go anywhere without the charger. Oh well. I start filling in a spreadsheet to organize what I’ve been researching.
I am blanket. Blanket is me. (Or is it I?)
I email my Boss about setting up a Zoom call for us and another person. Then tea time. I use a loose chai from Wegman’s. It’s really good; I’m glad their generic stuff tends to be decent quality.
9:50 To the ReStore. I almost forget my mask but luckily don’t. They’re strict about them, thankfully. I saw them kick out a man who tried to go in without one. He kept arguing that he had the right not to. Of course, and there are consequences to that. This is also a charity shop and volunteer run, so they probably care less about pissing off a few people. I feel bad for the businesses and employees who end up with potential losses from booting noncompliant customers. It’s not a dilemma I’d want to face.
Today I find a large peachy pillow, $3. Glad I didn’t get the other, since this fits better and is so soft. I also get two glass vases of similar height and shape but one has a vertical pattern ($1.00, with additional 50% off) while the other has a wavy pattern ($1.00, with additional 25% off). Close enough, for the guest bedroom flowers. And I finally drop off the box.
10:45 I reach Wegman’s to grab a few things. Two 10-pack meat sticks (12.29 each) and two 2-liter bottles of diet grapefruit soda ($0.75 each). I also look at the fish, since they stock fresh ones on Fridays and are usually sold out by evening. I love whole fish and would eat it every day if I could. I pick 2 porgies ($6.99/lb) and ask them to descale and trim the fish but keep the heads. I’ll get both fish heads tonight since K never eats them. I’m so excited for dinner!
More work at home. My boss CCs me on an email about me sent privately to her and few others. Her response is amazing and is a virtual mike drop. I appreciate her so much. I do a speedy lunch, ramen and soda. And speedy dressing: same pants as yesterday, sheer burgundy top, teal cardigan, the suede shoes. I finally bring my mug! It’s bigger so less tea trips.
2:00 Meeting with boss and another person our org works closely with. The prep I did is not useful, because the conversation turns in a different direction than expected.
4:15 I get home early and do last minute cleaning. K texted earlier that he should arrive by 6:00.
5:00 I haven’t heard kitty in a while, and get worried. I walk around calling her, and she meows in response, from our master bed. She rushes out once I open the door.
5:45 Finish work and take a shower. Kitty gets many pets in apology for accidenally imprisoning her. I manage to snip two of her nails, but she escapes before I can do the rest. Then the house alarm goes off. K is back! He says the house is chilly – okay I’m not going crazy XD He is skeptical that it’s truly 65 degrees in here and turns on the heat. The cat hides, shy again with K here. I tell him it’s probably his haircut. We unload the rental car and return it.
7:00 Dinner prep. I season the fish and wrap them in aluminum foil for the oven. This time I use salt, pepper, garlic powder, onion powder, paprika, and coriander. I chop up mushrooms to roast too.
The fish and veggies end up delicious! I do warn K about the little stomach bones. If we’re sharing one big fish, I split it into fillets and pick out all the bones myself, but we each have our own and I don’t feel like doing it twice. I get all the fish eyes, yum.
9:30 K tells me the news about Ruth Bader Ginsburg passing. A friend also texts me about it a couple of minutes later. I am so sad. She was such an amazing person and inspiring woman. I read an article detailing parts of her life I hadn’t known about before. This makes me even sadder, though.
10:00 We finish the strawberries together. K nods off during Adventure Time. I’m hit with a sense of déjà vu: this happened exactly, early on in our relationship. Sometimes history repeats itself in a cute way. We eventually go up to sleep. My mouth stings as I brush my teeth - the sore on the inside, near my lip, is getting worse. I've been trying not to irritate it too much since it's in an awkward spot, but that's clearly not working.
11:30 I’m still awake reading random things on my phone. So bad. I go to sleep.
Total $42.29
Day 7, Saturday
9:15 am Phone buzzes me awake. Friends confirm the Fall Festival plan.
10:15 I’m still in bed because warm. K offers to turn the heat up, but I’ll be fine. After I wash my face, I can’t find my towel so drip awkwardly over the sink until I remember one on a nearby shelf. K must have grabbed our dirty towels for laundry.
10:30 I put crepes in the oven to defrost. I wish I'd put parchment paper between layers when stacking, because it’s been annoying separating them.
K and I talk about the new health insurance cards, and what appointments I'll make. First will be Planned Parenthood, because I’m on my last pack of pills! The only time I wasn’t covered was the months after college graduation and before my job started. I worried so much that I’d have an accident and be buried in debt. Luckily didn’t happen. I also really appreciate when work pays into insurance, after having to pay the entire premium myself during grad school.
K browses the Nintendo shop and pulls up the Ori sequel. I do want it but think we should wait; $40 seems pricey and we have so many other games we haven’t started or finished. He tells me he did buy Hades on sale since we tend to play these types of games more. I really liked the trailer so glad he did.
11:30 I scroll online while I eat the crepes, watch K play Hades. I love the art, but not sure I’d be good. You battle many enemies, and you have to react fast. We switch and I play! It's challenging but not too much that I feel like I can’t figure it out. At some point, K finds socks on the ground and puts them on me since I’m too busy playing but still complaining about cold feet. Thanks K!
1:45 He reminds me we’re supposed to meet friends at 2:00. Today's outfit: green pleated maxi, a mustard top, and a magenta suede vest with long fringe on the shoulders and edges that reach my calves. One of my favorite statement pieces.
2:15 We find our friends and chat, waiting for the other ones. Apparently the festival was canceled, and instead there’s a small farmers’ market. Now I feel bad having asked them out for this – the cancellation wasn’t mentioned on the official webpage!
Our other friends get here and we check out the market. It smells delicious; there’s one stall with donuts, one with pretzels. K and a couple friends go for donuts. I find the dried bouquets vendor and request two with orange, pink, and purple-blue flowers. They cost $9 each, but K pays since I don’t have cash. We all decide to walk down the main street for fun.
4:00 I stop for $5 bubble tea. I get lavender with traditional bubbles (there are popping ones, but I think those are weird). It's yummy, enough flavor but not so much that I’m eating a candle. K and friends get ice cream, trying the fall flavors. Then we all part ways and go home. Another package at the door, with K’s name on it, but he’s not expecting anything. They’re cool wooden coasters with a laser cut outline of the city we met in! Turns out a friend sent it as a gift.
6:30 Dinner time. K baked chicken with cumin and other seasonings, plus rice and defrosted peas. We watch Adventure Time. It’s interesting to me how adult kids shows can be. There are incredibly sad/disturbing moments that would be completely missed by kids. During episodes I get text alerts from in my siblings' group chat. Adorable pictures of my cute niece, finally smiling instead of looking angry. For the rest of the night, K and I take turns playing Hades. He keeps getting further than me, but I’m not too behind!
9:30 Bed time. We’ll see if I can sleep early tonight.
Total $5.67
Weekly Total $69.97
Food + Drink = $46.89
Home + Health = $23.09
REFLECTION
I think I tend to buy little things during the week. In contrast, K tends to make bigger purchases of many items once or twice a month. It’s nice to see my spending be “normal” again, since for a few months I was spending a lot on furnishings and such. I do want to be better about buying less treats, and resist buying plants (though now that space near the windows is running out, less a problem). The resale market is good for calming my inner shopper. I don't feel like I’m missing out too much, because there’s so much out there that even if I don’t nab this thing, a similar thing will pop up later. So I'm okay being pickier about those purchases.

I am 35 years old make £50,000 live in NW UK and work as an accountant. This week i’m on holiday with just my dog, driving round the North Coast 500, Scotland’s answer to Route 66.
Day 1 - Saturday
6.30am -Eeek it’s here... I wake up and bring coffee upstairs to bed with the dog M for a last cuddle. I’m going to really miss my husband D but I do understand him not wanting to close his business again so soon after being closed for 3 months due to Covid. It might seem odd me holidaying on my own but we are very happily married - honest.
8am - I start getting my stuff together. I’m not a big fan of breakfast early on after waking up, but I have a long way to go today so I grab a muffin.I get myself ready, then get D to walk with me to the park, so that M can be thoroughly emptied and he gets a good run around. He’s not over pleased with his new car harness (he usually travels in D’s car with a dog guard) but I strap him in and off we set. 334 miles to go...
9am - I blast some tunes and M goes straight to sleep, and I push through until Gretna Green which takes just under 2 hours. I’ve often driven past here, but never stopped, but I need a wee and think it’s time to let M out too. We have a quick walk through around the visitor centre complex.
11.30am - I then hop back in the car, and my next stop is the Starbucks at the services. I had made myself a packed lunch but I annoyingly left it in the fridge and so I pick up a tuna melt and an iced coffee from some credit on my app. I’m breezing along at this point, the scenery looks stunning and I can’t understand why the sat nav is saying it’s going to take so long to arrive. I make a quick stop at a lay-by just to see if M wants a wee or a drink. Then I hit the outskirts of Perth... What should be the last hour takes 2, in fact it takes 30 minutes to drive a mile. I’m absolutely exhausted by this point and M is telling me he’s understandably fed up. We start moving again and I’m so tired it’s getting dangerous, and I notice that some of the lay-bys have access to a lovely riverside path, so I stop. I put M on his lead and we just do a 10 minute walk, which makes both of us feel better. Then the last 30 minutes through the most stunning scenery, and we’re here. Kingussie in the Cairngorms. I check in, this was one of the cheapest hotels and it’s great, they upgraded me to en-suite which was super kind, and the room is great albeit very hot.
4.30pm - I dump my bags and head straight out with M. I find a couple of places to let him off, then a lovely river for him to cool off as he’s super warm. Then to the hotel bar for a well deserved cold pint £4. The staff and (fairly well lubricated for 5pm) locals are so unbelievably friendly, couldn’t have picked a better place to stay. I shower as I’m dripping, get changed into something cooler, which I sweat in immediately as the room is boiling, then we walk out to where I have booked for dinner - the tipsy laird. The staff again are super friendly, and I order a cider, and the Tipsy burger with cheese. Everyone loved M and he was brought water straight away, but the only problem was that the table I was given was on the through flow to the toilets/kitchen so he was up and down like a yo yo saying hi to everyone, and I didn’t get the most relaxed meal. The burger comes though and it’s massive! Big feed for £12. I decide to leave after this, we’re parked in the middle of the through flow really, and it’s not super restful for either of us, so I pay the bill £15.65 and walk back the same way as earlier Max can have a run around and I phone D for a quick chat.
8.00pm - I head back to my hotel and buy a bottle of wine. £15.50 that I drink a glass of in the bar, a glass in bed, and pack the rest for another night. I watch a bit of tv on my iPad, and have an early night as we have an adventure tomorrow...
Miles travelled - 334 Hotel - £55 Amount spent - £55.64 including a half tank of petrol the night before
Day 2 - Sunday
7.00am- I had set an alarm this morning, as I have a bit to do, and I want to pre-empt any wee needs as we are 2 floors up in the hotel. He’s also had loads of water as it’s boiling. I didn’t get the best night sleep unfortunately which is a shame as the bed is amazingly comfortable. The room was unfortunately just super hot, nothing they could do as it’s been a heat wave. I’ve also never stayed away with M before except with family and he was hot and unsettled. So I had the window open, but all the young lads from Kingussie unfortunately decided to congregate under our window, playing their music from the car speakers making him quite understandably stressed. So I throw on last nights clothes and we go for a quick walk, then I come back up and shower, make coffee and pack the million things I seem to have brought up to the room. Not easy to travel light with a dog. I would have liked to have had breakfast here, but the hotel and both coffee shops in the village don’t open until 9, and I need to be on the road. So I just eat a muesli bar from the car and we head off towards Aviemore. Unfortunately my car sat nav gets me hugely lost, and keeps trying to send me down down gravel tracks to get on the A9 which surprise surprise don’t lead me onto a massive dual carriageway... I end up back tracking all the way I came as I had no phone signal to double check. Turns out I should have just carried on a few more miles. Puts me a bit behind schedule.
9.30am - I park the car at the air bnb that I booked, quickly pack a day rucksack and we frog-march down to the train station, as today, we’re going on a steam train. M’s first time on a train. I collect the tickets (£16.25 + £1 for M) and find our table. They have sold only half of the tables for social distancing and it’s really well organised. We choo choo off. It’s very picturesque, but mostly fields etc but still a worthwhile little outing. M isn’t quite as interested and goes to sleep. We get out at the first stop as I want to split my ticket, so I get a reservation for the later train back. They sort this for me (again everyone is super friendly) so I jump back on again. At the terminus I get out again for some photos and a leg stretch.
12.00pm - Back at the Boat Of Garten stop we gather our things and get off, as we have a reservation at the Boat inn for lunch. I order a pint of cider, and a sandwich and chips. We just hang out here for a while, well ages really as our train back isn’t until 3.30pm, unfortunately the middle train of the day got cancelled with Covid. About half way through I get a bit peckish again and order a sticky toffee pud and a glass of rose. I pay the bill which comes to £36.25. It’s coming up for our return train time so we wander back to the station, and not long after the train arrives.
3.30pm - We board and chug our noisy way back to Aviemore station, where I have a quick wee and then we walk the 30 mins back up to our air bnb to check in. I booked a tiny house just outside of Aviemore, and it’s ideal.. The lady who owns and runs it (it’s in her garden) has broken her elbow, but her Mum is there looking after her and they both show me around and make a fuss of M. I have a quick shower, and we both just chill out for a bit as we are exhausted. I decide not to go out tonight. It’s been a long couple of days, so I think fish and chips, a glass of wine and Netflix is on the cards. As I’m just about to head out the owner lets her dog in the garden and they have a fab 20 min play whilst I chat to Karen who is truly lovely.
7pm - I nip to the Co-op where I pick up a bottle of wine, and a pack of hot cross buns and some utterly butterly for the next 2 mornings breakfasts which costs £9.30, and then I order Haddock and chips for me, and a sausage for Max, £11.05. I head back to the cabin, get in my PJ’s, and just have a lovely chill. The cabin is amazing as night time wee’s can be achieved by just opening the door into the garden, shame I’m only here 2 nights. Write my trippie, and sleep like the dead.
Miles travelled in a car - should have been 15 but was actually more like 30 Miles travelled on a train - 20 Accommodation - £75 Amount spent - £73.95
Day 3 - Monday
6.00am - I wake up early so I nip to the toilet and then am just able to open the cabin door to the garden, and M can sort himself out which is just so easy. I take my medication then we both get back into (our separate) beds for a bit and fall back asleep. I wake up at about 8.30am to a snoring dog. I pop the kettle on, make myself a coffee then toast 2 hot cross buns for breakfast, setting off the smoke alarm in the process. Both fully breakfasted I pack a bag, load the car and we’re off to Loch Morlich.
10am - I find the right car park after a couple of bodged attempts, and scrape together the £1.50 car parking charge. I get a leaflet with a map (just worth pointing out I’m fair terrible with maps) and set off towards the beach. Well Mr water baby practically drags me in when he sees the loch. After a couple of false starts, me going the wrong way, then me following the wrong colour signs, and a brief occasion where M may have decided to join some kayakers, we get on the right trail, we are going to walk all the way round the Loch, about 6km. It’s quite warm, and very midgey but stunningly beautiful and we don’t see anyone for the first half until we start to come across people who are doing shorter walks from the other way. Towards the end we cross a bridge and I lose my path altogether, I know I’m not right but I am right next to the loch and can see where I need to go, so I just clip him on the lead and we follow the road. Later on I see where I need to be; the path is elevated on the other side of the road, but I decide scrambling up verges next to busy roads isn’t overly sensible. We make it back to the beach, let the boy have one last swim, then head back to the car where much towelling is done, as well as a bit of pre lunch damage control with wet wipes and a clean t-shirt for me.
12.30pm -Our lunch stop is the Old Bridge Inn, and so I park up and we wander in. It’s a beautiful old pub, and it’s Monday today and the UK govt eat out to help out scheme and so it’s 50% off. I order a cheese board which comes and is absolutely fab (but why do they never give you enough crackers) and a pint of cider. I have a little nose popping up to see if there is any cheese going spare. I eventually catch someone’s eye and ordered a piece of cheesecake. This comes with sorbet which makes me really happy as I love sorbet (and can’t eat ice cream). I get the bill which comes to a mere £11.90. This Eat out to help out is really going to help me stay within budget.
2.00pm - Back in the car, we drive back up the road to the home of the Cairngorm reindeer herd. The hill walk is one of the things I would have loved to do (I did it in 2008 though) but obviously no dogs are allowed, and due to Covid the little paddocks with a few to pat and snap are closed. I drive up regardless though just to see if I can spot one from a distance. Unfortunately no luck, so I head all the way back through Aviemore where I stop at the Cairngorm Brewery to choose some beers for DH as a gift. I debate dropping the car and going out for a drink, but M can barely keep his eyes open, and so I nip to the Co-op for a cold bottle of Prosecco. I still do have a couple of half bottles of wine, but neither are cold, so I’ll drink them later in the trip when I get a fridge or a bar with ice I can pinch.
4.00pm I just have a shower, get in bed for a bit, have a glass of Prosecco, message D and write my notes.
6.00pm - After a bit of a chill out, I get dressed, sort a few bits out then we wander out and into the village. On the way past we stop at a stone circle I spotted on google maps, pretty funky and right in the middle of a residential area. We get to our dinner reservation half an hour early, but they kindly seat me anyway, but just say I can’t order food until my reservation time which is no problem. It is super busy and it takes a while to get a drink, but I just read my book. I decide on a smokey chilli chicken pizza and skin on fries, and it comes and it’s massive! Also very spicy but really tasty, can’t complain at all. Total including 2 glasses of wine was £20.75, an absolute bargain. I love this eat out to help out business!
8.00pm - We wander back to our little cabin. Pj’s and a chill out in bed, we’re moving on tomorrow and it’s an early start so to sleep for both of us.. a lovely day and I’m so glad to have seen Aviemore again, but I’m excited to move on and see some more new places.
Miles travelled in a car - 15 Accommodation - £75 Amount spent - £51.35
Day 4 - Tuesday
7.00am - When the alarm goes off I snooze a couple of times, then start the process of showering and getting dressed whilst trying to make coffee and breakfast, pack and sort Mout all at once. I wash the dishes, then load the car, and off we go. Our first stop today is Dochgarroch lock, as we are going on a Loch Ness cruise.
9.00am - We make cracking time which is good as it did take me a little longer than expected to get everything in the car. We pass road signs highlighting a yellow weather warning for heavy rain (hello Britain) so I pack both our rain coats just in case. The boat is ready for us, so we wander on and sit outside at the back so I don’t have to wear a mask for 2 hours.
9.30am - We set off, chugging slowly down the canal, past the smallest lighthouse in Britain, and then when we enter Loch Ness we really pick up speed, charging right down the centre. No rain yet, in actual fact it’s very sunny so I keep swapping seats to try and get shade for us both, as stupid Mummy remembered his water bottle, but not his bowl to drink from. Yesterday when I went to the brewery, I completely forgot to pick up a beer or two for my best friends birthday, so when I see the Loch Ness lagers on the bar onboard, I buy 2. £9.20 which serves me right for not being smarter yesterday as they are double the cost. We pootle past Urquhart castle which I have visited myself back in the day, and I get some photos as they turn the boat round for us all to see. A lady is on board who is a single Mum with 2 kids (at least one special needs) and 3 chocolate Labradors. She managed to remember a water bowl though (what a human being) and she sends her little girl over to offer M water. I feel like my dog is quite rightly judging my parenting skills at this point as he pointedly drinks up like he’s not been offered water in days. We start to head back up the canal, and I must say I’ve really enjoyed it. Well worth it.
11.00am - Get back to the car and the first stop is filling the car up with Diesel. This comes to £45.47 but I buy a meal deal for £4.95 too as I’m getting hungry. Quick wee stop then I’m on the road,this is my first actual section of the NC500. First stop is Dornoch Beach. I park up for free and give M a real treat, a swim in the sea. I’m a bit nervous as it’s busier than expected but he’s completely excellent and charges around like a loon, but comes back to me with no issue at all. Much towelling and cold drinks for both of us, then back in the car. I’m looking for the stone remembering the last witch execution in 1727, it’s now in someone’s garden, but I find it.
1pm - On the road again we go, this time just to the outside of Dunrobin castle. I would definitely have paid to enter here and see the falconry display, but it’s not dog friendly. So I just take a photo and have a nosy, then it’s north again. This time it’s a quick stop at Cairn Liath, an old stone Broch. This is fabulous, we have to cross the A9 on foot which is a little hairy, but so worth it. I can let M off and we both have a good nosy around.
3.00pm - My last stop is a museum called the Timespan museum which I have read you can take dogs into. Unfortunately it’s closed though, so we decide just to push onto Wick where we are staying tonight. The roads get incredibly hilly, and I see my first Highland coo... you just wouldn’t imagine here you are anywhere near a big town, but then all of a sudden, a lidl, a retail park, and a town, with a wetherspoons
4.30pm -Find the hotel and check in, super friendly again. And I have a massive room on the ground floor near an exit to the car park, so incredibly thoughtful. The bed is huge too. I decide to go for a walk through town, I snap a photo of the world’s shortest street. And then I hunt down the Wetherspoons. I sit outside with M and order a pint of strongbow on the app. Absolutely ideal because I don’t even need to go inside to order and therefore leave him. I then realise I can order bar snacks from the app too, I even get 50% off my peanuts. If I’m honest, if i had known i could eat outside, and that it would be dry I would have eaten here tonight, but it is undoubtedly better to give the money to the independents after all. I stay here rather longer than expected, mostly because I realise my watch has not quite stopped but gone very slow. I spend under a tenner here including buying a bag of crisps for the car tomorrow. 7pm - Back to the room and I shower and get changed, feed M then wander to the hotel dining room. I’m eating in the residents lounge so I can keep M with me. To be honest with you, I think he’d prefer to be in the room in bed, but the hotel is packed with people coming past, and I’m worried he’ll bark if he gets startled so I keep him with me and he goes to sleep on the carpet. Then starts flirting with the Scottish ladies visiting. I order a wine, mozzarella sticks and chicken jalfrezi which are quite nice. This costs £20.50. I ring D, write my notes, then head to bed. It’s been a busy day, but a really good one..
Mikes travelled in a car - 149 Accommodation - £86.95 Amount spent -£91.48 but I have plenty of budget left from prior days to chip into the petrol
Day 5 - Wednesday
8am- Waking up I take the boss out for a quick wee, then head back to the room. Breakfast for him and shower for me. This hotel has been absolutely ideal, the only negative for me is that the walls and ceilings were paper thin, and I think the other guests of the hotel found the Wetherspoons too. This made M a bit unsettled as it was pitch black by this time and quite noisy, so I had to sleep the first part of the night with my foot in his bed to keep him calm. But then all went quiet and we had a lovely night sleep. The bed was amazing. We have breakfast in the residents lounge, which was great, and they even bring M a sausage.
9.30am - Then it’s time to check out, we’ve been very leisurely this morning because a couple of the first suggested stops are here in Wick, but don’t open until 10. I first head in the car to the Old Pulteney whisky distillery to look at souvenirs for D. The weather this morning is overcast to say the least, and I drive through some very industrial type areas. The town has a very different look and feel to it than yesterday strangely. I arrive and the smell of the whisky greets me, but unfortunately also does a sign saying they were closed. I snap a photo then off we go. Next is the Wick Heritage museum. I arrive at 10.04am to a big closed sign on the door. I decide to sit it out for a minute, and a lady does arrive and go through the door about 10.10am, but despite sitting it out for a while, the door remains shut with the big closed sign on the door. I know these places are small, but I wish they had updated their website/social media as I had got the impression they would be open. I won’t be deterred at my next stop though, Tesco petrol station, I only need just over a tenner, but it’s really cheap so decide to top the tank up and it’s on to John O’Groats. I’m glad we didn’t stay here the night, but it was a great little stop. Thankfully most things are open, so I head into the little Brewery and get D 3 local beers from the brewery in the village £10.50, then grab myself a coffee for the car, £2.90.
11.30am - It’s then onto Duncansby head lighthouse. And a bit of a walk over the field to the sea stacks. I really enjoyed it here too. The Castle of Mey is my next stop, this once used to be owned by the Queen mother and apparently has lovely gardens. I was hoping to be able to nip in like Dunrobin yesterday for a quick mooch and a photo, but they are only letting people in with pre-booked gardens tickets. They are super friendly though and point out where on the road I can get a quick photo. Then it’s onwards and upwards again. I follow the signs then for Dunnet Head. This is the most furtherly north place in the UK (not actually John O’Groats). This was a longish single track road to get there, and again there is a lighthouse, and viewpoints over to the Orkney islands. Again very worth the trip up and Max enjoys the walk around. Good practice for the single track roads too.
1.30pm -Back down the long winding track and it’s the Dunnet Bay gin distillery next. I don’t drink gin either, but my husband and best friend do, so I nip in and buy them some souvenirs £19.50. I’m desperate for a wee at this point, and the lady from the gin shop points me next door to hotel where they have outdoor toilets they don’t mind people using. I notice a really busy eating area, and a quick google later and they are doing eat out to help out. It’s nearly 2pm by this point, and I’m hungry, so I grab Max and sit outside. I order a lime and soda and some mac and cheese. This turns out to be a great idea, as I don’t really see anywhere else to stop on the way, it’s also delicious and costs me a whole £6.48. I spy a sign for a beach, and the boy has been so good, we go for a walk on Dunnet Bay Beach. This is absolutely stunning, and we both absolutely love it. Well I do until he brings me a present of half a dead fish.
3.30pm - Onto our destination for the evening, the village of Tongue. It doesn’t look that far, but the roads quickly become single track, very hilly and winding, and this time there are HGV’s rumbling past. I have to be honest I find it fairly traumatic, and don’t really get to take in the very stunning scenery for trying to avoid sheep who are napping in the passing places! I really wish I had stopped to photograph the roads. Truly beautiful but I didn’t half wish D was here. But I make it in one piece, with a rather big sigh of relief. I unclench my hands, and check into my room, it’s a single which is no problem, in fact the bathroom is bigger than the bedroom strangely. They have left me a complementary bottle of wine though which is a nice touch (I pack this for another night) I have a cool shower and just chill out for an hour or so with my book. It’s very warm, and incredibly midgey, I must have about 50 bites on me, but the bed is comfy. We go down and I order dinner, onion bhaji’s followed by lamb shank. The food is a little expensive, but absolutely lovely. I’m quite tired, so I take M out for a very quick walk round the village, then we head back upstairs. I think I have a lot of single track driving to do in the morning, so I have an early night watching MAFS Australia in bed. I think the older I get the earlier my bedtimes do 😂 It’s been a really good day despite a couple of closure early on.
Miles travelled in a car - 95 Accommodation - £60 Amount spent £79.50
Day 6 - Thursday
7.30am - I wake up to my alarm. Both of us slept really well. Think M is getting used to hotels now. It’s fairly wet, wild and windy this morning, but my weather app tells me it should be fairly short lived. For today anyway. Usual dog wee, shower, and packing up of our worldly possessions.
8.30am - I go down for breakfast, having packed the dog bed in the car, to find that I can’t have him with me for breakfast. I decide as it’s cool the car is the safer option, but I rush through breakfast as quickly as I can. I sneak a couple of bits out in a napkin to the car for him, then I pack up and check out.
9am - We drive for the first hour on single track roads, stunningly beautiful again but thankfully quieter so I build confidence a bit. I soon figure out the best way for me to slot in behind someone at a safe distance and almost take a tow. That way they make the call to go or stop, and I just follow. It takes me an hour to do 28 miles, but I’m happy enough pootling along. In fact my first tow is a campervan doing 30, but then I progress later to a VW Sirvocco doing 40, go me...
10am - Our first stop today was Smoo Cave, well what a fab stop, and I’m even able to let the little monster have a swim. It’s stunningly beautiful, and well worth the 10 minute walk back up and down. It has got very very warm, completely different to how it looked this morning when I got up.
11am - Only a few miles away was the Balnakeil craft village. I make a pit stop first at the famous Cocoa Mountain, where I get a coffee which comes with 4 chocolates for £5.95. I was going to buy D some chocolates to take home from here, but they are £1 a chocolate, and I’m worried they’ll end up in a soggy mess by the time I get home as it’s warmer than expected. So I just sit in the sun with my coffee for a bit have a quick nosy in one of the shops, but I’m no good in a mask, so I head back to the car and get on my way.
12pm- I snap some photos of the famous Kylesku bridge, then carry on, I miss the sign for the Rock shop which is recommended, this is possibly because it may be closed, and decide to do the optional detour to Lochinver. This wasn’t the best call. It’s 11 miles which does take about 20 minutes each way, and I head to the pottery shop. Well it’s all stunning, but at over £35 for a mug, it isn’t the souvenir shop for me. I haven’t had any lunch, so I stop at the Lochinver larder, a famous pie shop. Well all I want to do is buy a takeaway pie for lunch, but after 10 minutes in the queue which is just to pay, and seeing that no one who has ordered since I’ve arrived has got their lunch, I give up, I don’t want to leave M in the car for any longer. Luckily I have a spare pack of crisps and some haribo in the car.
2pm - Continuing on towards Ullapool which is my stop for the night, I spy the sign for the ruins of Ardvreck castle. Well this is a great stop and cheers us both up. He gets to swim, and I walk and clear my head. It is so beautiful, and we both really enjoy it. Not long after another sign for the Knockan Crag geological reserve. We enjoyed this too and walk the loop above the car park reading the signs and looking at the exhibits.
4pm - Not far from here to Ullapool, so we bundle back in the car and check in. It’s motel style, and can park straight outside the door, much easier for lugging our stuff in and out. Accommodation options in Ullapool weren’t cheap, this cost £95 for the room, and is 20 mins walk from the village, but it serves food and they are very nice, if a little Covid stressed.
4.30pm - We decide to follow their route to the village to give M a good walk. Ullapool is smaller than expected, but it’s very rugged and picturesque. We have a quick drink in the Seaforth inn £7, but then the bad weather is clearly coming in, and it starts raining, I’ve come out in flip flops, and a t-shirt, so not the most sensible, but it was sunny when I left half an hour ago. We nip into the Ferry Boat inn who kindly offer us a 30 min rain respite before their table bookings, and that’s all it takes. It’s sunny again. £5.50 for a glass of wine.
7pm - We wander back up the hill and order some food, goats cheese to start which is really tasty, and pepperoni pizza which is lovely but could do with 5 more mins in the oven. The owners are lovely, and we have a good chat; then it’s time for bed. Chat to D, tv, book and bed.
Miles travelled in a car - 104 Accommodation - £95 Amount spent - £61
Day 7 - Friday
7.30am - I wake up just before my alarm. Didn’t hear a peep out of the hound last night. He’s definitely now a hotel kinda dog. Pack everything up which is so much easier with the car parked right outside. Then I drive round for breakfast. I’m not really hungry but I do my best.
9.00am - I nip to Tesco to get some car snacks and a birthday card for my niece, £8.80, then join the queue for the petrol station on the way out of the village. I decide to fill up just in case which comes to £21.23. We set off, and our first stop is the Corrieshalloch gorge which has an incredible suspension bridge. We have a wander about and snap some photos, then back to the car for us.
11am - It’s then a detour to Mellon Udringle beach, this is up a single track road, I start to wonder if I have gone wrong, but I get there and it’s beautiful. M charges around and swims for ages. I had noticed a field of sheep when we arrived, but what I stupidly hadn’t noticed was the field had no fences. I turned round and M was nose to nose with a rather large ram with horns bigger than me. They were just looking at each other. I screeched and grabbed him quick and we toddle back off to the car and back on the road. There are some famous gardens at Inverewe which sound fab, but we can’t take dogs in so we didn’t stop.
1pm - About a mile or two before the village of Gairloch I hear some funny noises (followed by a funny smell) from the back seat. I quickly turn round and see a sea of vomit. Now anyone who knows me knows that I can deal with all the poo in the world, but I’m terrible with vomit. I think it’s a belly full of sea water as normally he has a gut of iron. I quickly find a petrol station and pull in, finding somewhere to tie poor M up I try to deal with the back seat. I throw the towel straight in the bin which caught most of it, but it’s everywhere and he clearly is feeling really poorly and I can’t set off yet. Leaving him tied up in the shade with some water I take the opportunity to jet wash the car as it’s covered in bird poo and he eats his body weight in grass, then throws it all back up again. Feeling safe enough to set off, we literally make it to the next parking stop, and we limp on like this for some time. We get to the Victoria falls car park, and a short walk seems to do him a bit of good. The falls are lovely, but it’s very very midgey.
3pm - A little further on we reach the shores of Loch Maree. It’s a lot less midgey here, so I sit on a rock next to the car, and he just potters about eating grass and paddling his feet in the water, and he seems to be a bit better. So we set off properly again. We reach Torridon and decide not to stop for a drink, but plod on. The roads get very narrow but it’s incredibly beautiful.
4.30pm -Arriving at our destination for the night, Lochcarron, I have a drive through the village, then head off to a tartan shop called Lochcarron weavers. I was looking for cushions or maybe a rug, but I end up buying DH a lovely woollen jumper that’s on sale at £40, guessed the sizes so fingers crossed. I decide to leave the ruins of Strome castle for the morning, so we drive back to the Loch, and I spot a fish and chip van. I’ve had no lunch with vomit gate, so I just get a portion of chips, and I eat them on a bench looking out over the Loch, but then the rain starts so we go check in. Now I must say the reviews of this place were terrible. But it was cheap, dog friendly and right where we needed to be, so I decided to take it with a pinch of salt. I’m glad I did, the room does look a little dated, but it’s clean, very friendly and I’m on the ground floor. My room in Ullapool last night was dated too but cost £95, today was £55. I give him some water and a nap (but no tea as yet which causes some consternation) then we wander next door to the barestaurant when he has had a good rest.
6pm - The food looks fab. An older lady with her son orders the special of ribs, and I’m sold. I order a leek and goats cheese tart followed by the ribs, the food is a little dear, the starter alone is £9, but we are very remote and it is very tasty. I would normally have had a helper with the ribs, but I didn’t dare, so I got a lot of incredulous puppy stares. Instead a tiny portion of dry dog biscuits for him, and a glass of wine for me from the car, and an early night again.
Miles travelled in a car - 130 Accommodation - £55 Amount spent - £73.93
Day 8 - Saturday
5am - I wake up in the pitch black to the unmistakeable sound of retching. Jump up, put the lights on and there are 3 piles to deal with.. thankfully just undigested grass really, and I have my handy wet wipes so we have it cleaned up in no time, and I decide to take him out to see if he needs a wee or anything whilst I’m awake. We just have a quick walk along the water front, being careful not to get locked out of the hotel, then back in and it’s back to bed for both of us.
8am - Getting up again and the monster seems to be feeling much better. We go next door for breakfast, but I just have a yoghurt and a croissant. It was lovely though. I really enjoyed this hotel, it was friendly, laid back and right on the route. I pack up the room, and give M a third of his normal breakfast (which he wolfs down) and we get in the car.
9.30am - We head just up the road for now to the ruins of Strome castle. I can’t let him off the lead here because there are lots of sheep, but it’s a great little stop for a walk around. It starts to rain but only quite lightly at this stage.
10am - He seems ok so we get on the road towards Inverness and eventually home (tomorrow). I must admit I had very serious thoughts of trying to just head home, both yesterday and at 5am, but I’m very far from home, nearly a 9 hour drive, and as such I think it would be better to stop regularly to offer him water and fresh air, rather than trying to push through. I have a quick call with D who reminds me that dogs eat things they shouldn’t all the time and to stop worrying, he’s eating, drinking and toileting normally and so to carry on but just not over feed him and offer him regular breaks. So our next stop is the Glen Dougherty look out, which is apparently stunning on a clear day but it wasn’t a clear day. So just a quick look about and off we go again. Nice for a photo and a leg stretch though.
11am - Last stop for us on the NC500 route is Rogie Falls. This is a great stop and walk down to the waterfalls. Apparently at the right time of year you can see salmon jumping up the falls, but it wasn’t to be today, this stop was incredibly busy, the car park was completely full and I had to wait a while to get parked, but it was a lovely walk and we both really enjoyed it.
12pm -Not long after this we reach Inverness and leave the NC500 route, we’re a little early to head to Pitlochry which is our stop for the night, so I do a couple of things, firstly grab a quick drive through McDonald’s for lunch £8.80, then fill up the car at the Tesco petrol station which comes to £19.87.
1.30pm - It’s only 90 mins to Pitlochry from here. And so I think I’ll be a little early really, so I head to Culloden battlefield for a walk around. Well unfortunately the heavens just open, and we are both completely drowned. Rather rudely I felt M wasn’t over interested in the Jacobites. But we have a very quick walk round, and then a towel off and on the road. I tell him I’ll put Outlander on for him when we get home. I’m actually very interested in history but I have been to the visitor centre before (and read and the watched the Outlander series which I’m sure is super accurate ).
4pm - We hit Pitlochry. I can’t get into the hotel car park, but I find street parking and check in nearby. This place is quite fancy, it’s in the same chain as the lunch I had on the steam train right at the beginning. Here it’s sort of a fancy gastro pub with rooms upstairs. This was the costliest of my accommodation at £99 but also the nicest. My heart does sink a bit though when I see where my room is. Sort of up two flights of stairs and round a lot of corridors and through several fire doors. I really hope we don’t need 5am dashes tonight. It’s nice to have a bit of luxury though too, most of my accommodation has been fairly basic, not even offering toiletries or tea/coffee in all cases. So this room with it’s very fancy toiletries and biscuits is very welcome.
5pm - We chill out for a bit, and I even nod off for 15 mins which is incredibly unlike me. Then we have a quick walk through the town, which looks lovely, and then head into our hotel/pub for dinner. I order the spaghetti carbonara with garlic bread. It’s lovely but very big, and I only manage half, but I did have lunch today.
8pm -We go for a last walk through the town, I contemplate an outdoor drink at a different pub, but I can’t find a table, so I have a glass of car wine, call DH, and watch Indian Matchmaking on Netflix.
Miles travelled in a car - 147 Accommodation - £99 Amount spent - £78
Day 9 - Sunday
8am - I wake up, and the boy has slept like a log. It really was a lovely room. I get up and he seems in no rush to leave his bed, so I quickly shower and pack and we head down the maze together. I take him for a wee and load the car. And then we pop in through the front door for breakfast. They kindly serve me brekkie in the bar so I can keep M with me. I order a couple of hot items, and they bring Lorne sausage which I’m not sure about so I risk sneaking a bit to M who thankfully seems back to normal.
9am - We jump in the car, and get on the road. We are going home today, but stopping at Glasgow to see my little brother. I stop at a Starbucks just outside Perth for a coffee (£10 loaded on my app), then arrive just before 11 to Pollok country park. Unfortunately it’s really very rainy, but I find my brother (A) who is 21 and just finishing up his time at uni, loan him my brolly, and put rain coats on both M and myself. We walk for over 2 hours, just chatting and getting lost. Most of the walk is spent trying to find the Highland Cows I drove past on the way in, and we do finally succeed. M absolutely loves it, and doesn’t stop running around and sniffing everything in sight. Eventually we decide to call it a day as I’m a way away from home. I drop A off at the Asda, pick up a quick Maccy’s for the car £8.40 and we head home. We end up doing it in one go (about 3.5 hours) as M was completely zonked out on the back seat. DH phones and we chat for ages, then with about 45 mins to go, we hang up and he says he’ll see me at home. I get in, to no DH. I unpack his gifts and finally give him a ring. Turns out there has been a terrible shock as his Dad had a heart attack whilst out shopping. Thankfully all is ok, but DH gets home a bit ashen, and we go round to his Mum’s to await seeing how his surgery goes, which thankfully is all fine. D picks up an Indian takeaway on the way back from his Mum’s, he opens a beer from his gift pile, and we breathe a big sigh of relief. It’s super lovely to see him.
Miles driven - 300 Amount spent - £18.40

Brevard Stats: Total Infected: 95 confirmed (unofficial reports from medical staff are significantly higher) Total Hospitalized: 28 Total Deaths: 2 Total Cured: 0 Total Tested: 702 Total Positive: 47 Total Negative: 266 (old data) Tests Pending: 16 (old data)
^{as of 4/7/2020}
Click here for info on how to sign up for Brevard County emergency alerts.

Note: newest info is at the bottom.

3/3/20: Latest statement from the Brevard EOC: https://sites.brevardcounty.us/PIRA/PIRA/ViewRelease.aspx?ID=3775
Apparently dentists are running out of masks: https://www.reddit.com/321/comments/fd541j/surgical_mask_buying_hysteria/
Local companies are canceling travel planning and telling employees to stay home, hand sanitizer is sold out, there’s a run on TP. Please use this thread to discuss anything locally COVID-19 related whether it’s closings, preparation updates, or anything else. I’ll update with a sticky post with the latest local info as well as update the text here.
Right now we have ZERO cases, but the EOC press release says it’s a matter of when, not if, it shows up here.
Apparently 24 people are in quarantine right now in Brevard because of travel to high infection countries: https://www.floridatoday.com/story/news/local/2020/03/03/health-expert-brevard-very-likely-experience-coronavirus-cases/4937004002/
Edit 3/4: courtesy of Evilwad, here’s excellent information from a terrific source https://www.who.int/emergencies/diseases/novel-coronavirus-2019/advice-for-public
Edit 3/5: per Brevard EOC, COVID-19 call center number is 866-779-6121, or email [email protected]. They’re open 8AM-8PM M-F
All people under quarantine in Brevard have been cleared https://twitter.com/BrevardEOC/status/1235541802347831296
Edit 3/12: here’s an update from BPS, thanks to RW63 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pqJOx2uxrvM
Edit 3/12: all public schools are closed in Florida until the 30th. https://www.floridatoday.com/story/news/education/2020/03/13/coronavirus-gov-desantis-orders-all-florida-public-schools-close-through-march-30/5046502002/
Edit: 3/13: all cruises are cancelled. Publix will be closing early from here on out (8PM). Schools are closed. Disney and Universal Studios are closed. Stay healthy this weekend everyone!
Edit 3/13: press release from Brevard County https://sites.brevardcounty.us/PIRA/PIRA/ViewRelease.aspx?ID=3792
Edit 3/13: all Brevard library events are canceled. See post below.
Edit 3/15: Norwegian Cruise passengers stranded at Port Canaveral, and Taco Bell is considering closing dining rooms and going to drive-thru and delivery only. https://www.wesh.com/article/norwegian-passengers-stranded/31490363 and https://www.khon2.com/coronavirus-2/taco-bell-prepares-to-operate-as-drive-thru-delivery-only-restaurant-as-covid-19-spreads/ (non-local source)
Edit 3/16: KSC visitor center is closed. Restaurants locally are starting to switch to delivery and takeout only.
Edit 3/16: https://www.floridatoday.com/story/news/local/2020/03/16/brevards-beaches-remain-open-now-despite-closings-elsewhere-state/5061625002/ Beaches in Brevard are open (ed - not parking lots as of 3/19... walk or bike up only). FLL and MIA beaches are apparently closed. They’re considering a closure though
Edit 3/16: Brevard EOC is at level 2 activation https://mobile.twitter.com/BrevardEOC
Edit 3/17: it’s here... thanks you Carb0n12 and Nadieestaaqui for the notice. https://spacecoastdaily.com/2020/03/newsflash-florida-department-of-health-confirms-first-coronavirus-case-in-brevard-county/
Edit 3/17: local closures list is here: https://www.floridatoday.com/story/news/local/2020/03/16/coronavirus-space-coast-closures-changes-new-hours-limitations-covid-19/5057142002/
Edit 3/17: all bars and nightclubs are closing statewide at 5pm today: https://www.floridatoday.com/story/news/2020/03/17/florida-bars-and-nightclubs-must-close-5-p-m-tuesday-because-coronavirus/5066539002/
Edit 3/17: here is the latest update from BPS, including information on meals for children: https://www.brevardschools.org/site/default.aspx?PageType=3&DomainID=4&ModuleInstanceID=5964&ViewID=6446EE88-D30C-497E-9316-3F8874B3E108&RenderLoc=0&FlexDataID=56215&PageID=1
Edit 3/17: schools closed until April 15 now https://www.fox35orlando.com/news/school-closures-extended-until-april-15-testing-for-floridas-k-12-public-schools-canceled-governor-desantis-says
Edit 3/18: I was super busy today and had zero chance to make any updates. I’ll get caught up tomorrow. Sorry all!
Edit 3/20: I’ll finally have time to start tracking the news again today.

• The big news locally is we had a 2nd and 3rd (confirmed) case locally: a Northrup Grumman employee and a state government employee in Cocoa.
• Beaches are open but beach parking is not. As of yesterday, county and Mel Beach parking was closed but Indialantic was not; I expect them all to be closed as of today. Cape Canaveral National Seashore is closed. Sebastian Inlet, as a State Park, may still be open with reduced hours. Jetty Park is closed. Cocoa Beach issued a temporary ban on drinking alcohol on the beach
• Florida COVID-19 tracking map (thanks whiteshadow255): https://fdoh.maps.arcgis.com/apps/opsdashboard/index.html#/8d0de33f260d444c852a615dc7837c86
• Nationwide fever tracking chart: https://health weather.us/ (no bueno for FL)
• The Brevard Zoo is closed until March 30
• Dental offices are all closed for the next 3 weeks (no source... I just overheard a hygienist talking yesterday)
• Publix has dedicated 7-8AM on Tuesday and Wednesday mornings as senior citizen shopping only, 65 and over only. It’s to ensure they can shop when the store is as clean as possible after overnight sanitization and to be sure they aren’t in as crowded of a store.
• I’m sure I missed some. I’m going to be going through what everyone has been posting the past few days looking for anything important.
• There will be an AMA with a Miami police officer about the coronavirus response on /Miami today at 10AM noon. I got permission from their mods to crosspost it here so keep an eye out for that

Sources are below in this thread and in other posts here on /321. I’ll start including them again going forward. Please continue to send in the tips, and thank you all for helping to keep us up to date!
 
Edit 3/20: Brevard County facilities will start closing today to the public at noon (thanks YouGotRealUgly!): https://sites.brevardcounty.us/PIRA/PIRA/ViewRelease.aspx?ID=3800
Edit 3/20: Gov DeSantis suspends all dine in service, ordering restaurants to switch entirely to take out and delivery (thanks denisesaysaloha!): https://www.cnn.com/world/live-news/coronavirus-outbreak-03-20-20-intl-hnk/index.html This Executive Order also closes all gyms and fitness centers.
Edit 3/21: Brevard has a 4th confirmed case now (thanks jordanManfrey!) https://www.floridatoday.com/story/opinion/2020/03/20/coronavirus-woman-talks-testing-positive/288202500
As the number of infections grows locally, it’s going to become unwieldy to keep posting a new article every time is happens. I’m going to keep a running statistic at the top of this post from here on out. Please keep the data coming in though!
Edit 3/23: state parks are all closed now (thanks Str0ber!): https://www.floridatoday.com/story/news/2020/03/23/florida-coronavirus-state-parks-now-closed-indefinitely-response-covid-19-direction-gov-desantis/2896823001/
Edit 3/26: it’s been a few days since I added a text update. The only real local news has been increasing numbers which I’m tracking above. Around Florida, Miami and Orlando are under lockdown orders. Brevard County leadership is meeting tomorrow (Friday) morning to discuss something. Disney and Universal are under the Orlando/Orange County lockdown so don’t expect them to open until April 12.
For the latest updates: https://www.floridatoday.com/story/news/local/2020/03/19/coronavirus-brevard-county-updates-confirmed-covid-19-cases-deaths-map-what-symptoms/2873236001/
We have at least one Florida Today reporter contributing now, and welcome! Anyone else in an official status who wants to help share let us mods know and we’ll help you with custom flair. Also note that, unless you state otherwise, any contributions you make here will be considered personal and not official statements from your employers.
Edit 3/26: All beaches are closed from 11AM-4PM Friday through Sunday. The situation will be re-evaluated early next week. This is developing so no links yet...source: https://www.floridatoday.com/story/news/local/2020/03/26/brevards-policy-group-issues-recommendations-beach-closings/2919545001/ Edit 3/26: the county decided to keep the beaches Open all weekend after all: https://sites.brevardcounty.us/PIRA/PIRA/ViewRelease.aspx?ID=3811
Edit 3/26: Beaches will remain open outside of Cocoa Beach: https://sites.brevardcounty.us/PIRA/PIRA/ViewRelease.aspx?ID=3811
Edit 3/27: the state gov is setting up border checkpoints on highways into the state, probably alongside the existing agriculture checks that trucks already have to stop starting. It’s going to be a traffic mess. The CA all vehicle checks are bad enough and they have the infrastructure for it. At least we’re not getting those bullsshit inland border checkpoints. https://www.floridatoday.com/story/news/2020/03/28/florida-coronavirus-updates-march-28-total-covid-19-cases-top-3-000/2932343001/?utm_source=floridatoday-Coronavirus%20Watch&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=baseline_greeting&utm_term=list_article_thumb
Edit 3/30: there are likely way more people infected here than the numbers reflect due to lack of testing. Thanks bail-y for the article! https://www.floridatoday.com/story/news/2020/03/30/covid-19-cases-official-count-brevard-florida/2927747001/
Edit 3/30: Brevard EOC is at level 1 activation https://www.brevardfl.gov/viewrelease.aspx?ID=3814
Edit 3/31: Brevard County significantly relaxed criteria for testing and is opening a drive through testing center. Call to make an appointment you qualify on the phone number listed in the press release: https://www.brevardfl.gov/viewrelease.aspx?ID=3816
Edit 4/1: Gov. DeSantis just issued a stay home shelter in place order as of 12:01AM Friday (Thursday night): https://www.floridatoday.com/story/news/2020/04/01/florida-gov-ron-desantis-issue-stay-home-order-beginning-midnight-thursday/5104988002/
Edit 4/5: Expanded testing is finally here! Both the state/county and Omni healthcare are testing: https://twitter.com/BrevardEOC/status/1246841183944531968/photo/1
Edit 4/7: here’s the latest press release from the county: https://www.brevardfl.gov/viewrelease.aspx?ID=3823

I'm on mobile but I'll try and fix every mistake but there may be some that slip through the cracks.
Ok, a little backstory. I'm in my school's marching band, and we went to Florida to march in the Walt Disney World Parade. We went to Disney World, Epcot, Animal Kingdom, Hollywood Studios, Cocoa Beach, and Disney Springs, and I'm currently on my way to Universal Resort. With the exception of this event, I've been having a great time.
OP: Me (Third Person) F: Friend EM: Entitled Mother EB: Entitled BT DB: Disney Bro
Me and F were at Hollywood Studios, and we were on the Rock n Rollercoaster (An Aerosmith themed rollercoaster) and for those who haven't been to Hollywood Studios, the line for the coaster is VERY long, like 100+ minute wait long.
So at this point, me and F are about halfway through the line at this point, and we are hot (We are originally from Iowa and weren't quite used to the 70+ degree weather). So we were sitting on our phones, doing what teenagers do, and just trying to kill time.
Enter EM and EB.
EM was about 10 people behind us, and she comes up to us (By cutting everyone behind us).
EM: "Hey, can my son play your phone?"
Me: "Um... No, sorry, I can't do that. I don't even know who you are."
EM: "Why not? That kid has a phone, and I've heard you talking to him! Just share!"
Me: "I'm sorry, but how do I know you won't run out with my phone? I have very private and important things on it."
EM: "Ugh, it's just a PHONE! What could you POSSIBLY have that is so important!"
Sidenote: I have a few pictures of my late father who passed away unexpectedly in late 2017, which is 90% of what I mean't by "important things."
Me: "It's none of your business. Bottomline, you can't have my phone."
EB: "Mommy, I want that!"
EM: "You will honey."
EM drops her purse (Seemingly on accident) and goes to the Cast Member (Disney's employees for the uninformed). This is where DB comes in.
EM: Here's the THUGS I was talking about!"
Me and F: "What?"
EM: "See, there's my purse! Right next to them!"
Me: * Visibly angry * "What the hell are you on about? You dropped your purse!"
EB: * Crying at this point * Mommy, Im booooooored!!
EM: "These neanderthals even took my son's toy, arrest them!"
DB: "Alright, ma'am, I'll go get the officers."
My heart drops at this point, I thought he believed her and I was going to be arrested. I have squeaky clean record and my parents would be PISSED if they heard I got ARRESTED.
EM: "This is a lesson boys: Respect your elders!"
EM does that weird pose superheroes do, with their hands on there hips in this, "I won and I'm great."
EM tries to take my phone out of my hand, saying "I won't need it in prison!"
DB: "Alright ma'am, please step away."
EM is delighted, until she turns around, with no cops in sight.
EM: "Wheres the cop?"
DB: "Ma'am, I've heard reports from other sections of the park about a disrespectful women with a young boy who fits your description harassing multiple guests around the park."
EM: "Untrue!"
DB: "Even if that wasn't, I checked the cameras, and you clearly drop your bag, and they didn't even lay a finger on it."
EB: * crying *
EM: "My son is crying! Arrest these criminals, and let me through the line! You've wasted enough of my time!"
DB: * Calls in security *
EM: "Thank you!"
EM and EB start to cut through the line when they're stopped by DB.
EM: "What?! That was part of the deal, wasn't it?"

• Security shows up and starts to escort her to the park entrance *

EM is escorted out of the park, yelling profanities on top of EB crying.
I took a sigh of relief and started talking to DB. He's really into videogames and we exchanged Discord usernames. No sign of EB so far, and I shouldn't have any other issues.

It’s been a month since the Mothership exploded, and I’m out on my last expedition of the summer. We’re three days into a grueling headwind-and-drizzle canoe trip, skirting along the border trail in Southern Ontario. Basically I’ve been dragging Chem-Dad and the boys and all their gear across these impossibly long portages, driving them like wet mules. A chill, late-summer rain jabs at us horizontally as we slog through one choppy lake after another, and no one has said a word since I tore Chem-Dad a new one this morning.
I was standing on a craggy bank, trying to get a snapshot of those moose petroglyphs north of Basswood Falls (the ones so clear it looks like someone came out there last week, did them with a stencil and a $2 can of red spray paint, but are really two thousand, five thousand, maybe ten thousand years old), and Chem-Dad T-boned my canoe, sent the bow right into my shins. I gave him hell, told him he was the cock-suckerin’est bitch I’d ever had to guide. Said, “What would you pansy-asses do if I got a broke leg? Don’t you realize the radio’s useless this far out? Line of sight, remember? Line of fucking sight.”
That was this morning.
Chem-Dad is some kind of mid-management chemist- bureaucrat at a drug company in Philly. I don’t know which one. Don’t care. He must not be a very good one because when they first got off the bus with their troop and got assigned to me, I found out what he did for a living, asked him, “You got any drug pens? I love those Zoloft pens, things last forever.”
He just put up his palms, shrugged, gave me that Alfred E. Neuman look.
It was disappointment from minute one. That’s the way it goes with the Scouts, twenty of ’em drive up in a couple vans or a charter bus, and on the way the Scoutmaster decides who all the assholes are, sticks them in one crew so everyone else can have a good time. I always get the asshole group. It doesn’t matter to me though, this is my last trip to the Quetico and my last chance to make it to Little Argo.
When we were still in base-camp I was showing them our itinerary on a wall map in the gift and tackle shop. I only had to say two things to get them to follow me wherever I wanted to go.
I put my finger on the map and said, “Here. Little Argo—nice campsites, awesome fishing.” I could see the boys react to the word awesome, their faces tense with anticipation, the word bouncing around between them telepathically. “Northern pike the size of your leg,” I added.
Chem-Dad scrunched his nose, gawked at the map through his bifocals, said, “Geeze, that’s pretty far. How far is that?”
I had part of the map obscured with my forearm, hoping they wouldn’t notice.
“Round-trip?” I asked.
Chem-Dad nodded.
“In miles, or in rods?”
“What’s a rod?”
“Sixteen and a half feet.”
“In miles then,” he said.
“About ... a hundred, a hundred and ten, depending on your route.”
I knew it was more like 140, so I said again, “Awesome fishing.”
That was three days, thirty portages and seventy-five miles ago. I don’t know what that is in rods.
By the time we get back from Ely I can feel the seeds digesting, acidic bile cramping my gut. I park the truck, and Loechner and I creep across camp in the dark down to the landing on Moose Lake. I’ve got an Indian blanket and a lighter I found two weeks ago, floating near a portage head on Kekekabic. Loechner has a bottle of water, a dime bag of crap-weed, and a dugout oney that’s clogged as shit with resin, so we’re living the motto: Be Prepared. As quiet as we can we pull a canoe off a rack, hijack some paddles and vests, and launch into the lake.
The water is calmer than dead calm. This is afterlife calm, I think. And the only noise I hear is the whorl of our paddle blades cutting the surface and a loon calling unanswered from miles away at the south end of the lake.
We ate the seeds on the way into town. Six each. Pink, acrid Hawaiian Baby Woodrose seeds—Argyreia Nervosa. Bought some OJ at the first open gas station, and chugged it down on the drive back, trying to get those nasty kernel chunks out of our teeth. And now, as we move frictionless across the water, I can feel my spine straighten and a kind of warm static flowing down from my brain stem.
The rain is fizzling, and there’s about an hour of sunlight left, so Chem-Dad, the boys and I set up on an island at the north end of Thursday Bay. We unpack our gear and pull the Alumacrafts up on shore, out of the water.
The boys are fifteen or sixteen years old, and all they talk about is professional baseball and loose high school girls. And I can’t tell any of them apart; two of them are Chem-Dad’s sons, but I’m not sure which because they all have that same stupid, weary towhead gaze about them, and if I’m not mistaken, at least two of them are named Brad. I’ve been pretty roughneck with this crew so far, and I know it’s not their fault. It’s the dreams. Right now Gina’s probably trimming and hanging a whole bedroom full of buds to dry, and every night I’m wrestling with the Vamps in my sleep, running, escaping through the woods. By the time I wake up, lying numb and painful on the ground, I’ve already had a long night’s journey.
So, when the Brads get to whining about the death march and the rain, I tell them there’s nothing in the first aid kit for their chronic vaginitis. I offer to drop them off in Pansyville on our way to the day spa.
While they struggle with their tents I pull out the chuck box and start fixing dinner. I always cook. I’m supposed to teach the tenderfoots how to cook, but I don’t like diarrhea and sandy food and hate undercooked rice, so I do it myself. You let these kids cook and three out of five attempts end with scalding foot burns and a steaming, muddy pile of noodles, al dente.
On my first trek I had the Scoutmaster, Skipper Steve, cut some onions for my famous trail fajitas, and he comes back like fifteen minutes later with a pile of meticulously diced cubes, each one clinging to a tiny piece of moldy onion peel. As I picked every one of those bastards clean I decided to spare myself the pain from then on.
After dinner I boil the dishwater and tell Chem-Dad and the boys to get their smellables together and hang the bear bag. They all grumble.
“I don’t think a black bear would swim out to an island like this for no reason,” says Chem-Dad.
“Exactly,” I say, “and if you don’t hang that bear bag they’ll have all the reason they need.”
“Look, I seriously doubt a bear can even swim that far.”
“Hang the goddamn bear bag.”
At the south end of the island, on a treeless jag of rust-veined igneous rock, we pull the canoe up and turn it on its side in the little makeshift campsite. We sit on the crag on our PFDs and lean back against the canoe, look up at the curdled swath of Milky Way above us.
“What the heck is that?” says Loechner.
“Mars,” I say.
“Ah, bull. That’s like a plane or something.”
“No way, dude. This is the closest it’s been in sixty thousand years, supposedly.”
Loechner doesn’t get it, and the way the seeds are treating me, I doubt I could make any sense out of it if I tried.
We take a couple of nervous tokes on the oney and talk, trying to distract ourselves from the toxic gnaw in our guts. He tells me he’s decided to stay here at the end of summer, keep away from the Twin Cities tweak scene. Says he wants to rent a cheap place in Ely and blow it up with grow lights.
“You ever grow indoor?” I ask.
“Ah, heck no, but I’ve been putting plants out in cornfields since I was sixteen, ya know.”
“It’s different,” I say. “Not like outdoor. Indoor’s a whole different thing.”
I tell him about the timers and fans, the light poisoning and humidity problems, the smell and the hassle of trying to dispose of hundreds of pounds of wet, used soil and piles of evidence every couple months.
“Ain’t cheap either. Those lights are at least two-fifty, three hundred bucks new. Don’t even bother unless you get a thousand watts or more.”
This is me covertly worrying about Gina, at home in Mon County, watering the plants I started a couple months ago, almost mature now. Thought makes me cringe.
“But it’s scary, dude. You’re sitting on plants every fucking day for months and months, and it’s a cycle so you can’t stop cause it takes forever to get going again, and you’re thinking about them all the time. Like when you’re in class you’re wondering if someone’s stealing your shit, at home you think any second the Feds are gonna bust in and fuck your world. When you’re in bed, you hear some noise, you just know it’s cops, your heart starts pounding.”
I want to tell him about the nightmares, about the midnight terrors, the chase dreams, the maniacal psychosis come harvest time. I should tell him about the way the anxiety threads itself into every moment, conscious or not, how it manifests when your defenses are down, and how your mind still contemplates the consequences when you’re in vulnerable sleep, animating them with oracular dreams.
I start wondering if Gina’s having the dreams, the ones with the Vampire-Nazis, Federales, SWAT team troopers in black,; or the ones I have about Bear Fork washing away in a flood, or Bear Fork burning down, getting struck by a comet, or Bear Fork getting squatted by some Buckeye yokel while we’re away. I think she’s not; it’s my own private torture.
By midnight the crew is sleeping and I’m in a canoe floating in the middle of Thursday Bay, pulling oney rips out of John Loechner’s little dugout, making only enough motion to hit the pipe and keep myself facing north. The Alumacraft is like a compass needle now, pulled in line by the visual magnetism of the northern lights as I give the paddle a slight jostle every few minutes. I’m stoned and dumbstruck. The night is pristine and the auroras are pulling themselves into domed, crystalline formations, alternating white and green.
I’m vacillating between feelings of gratitude and guilt, thankful that I’m out here to see this tonight, thankful that Loechner gave me a pinch and a pipe before my crew launched. But I feel selfish for not waking the others to see this. I keep telling myself that I’ll go get them when it peaks, but it’s still getting brighter, the tones deeper. The trees on the Canadian side of the lake are backlit now like stage props. Seeing something like this could change your life, especially a dude like Chem-Dad. He even mentioned how much he’d like to see the lights while he’s up here.
But I feel like this spastic display of solar chemistry is for my own private viewing, like I came out and summoned it with a burnt offering, silent prayers. So, fuck changing Chem-Dad’s life, I’m busy changing mine.
The night paddle is the best, with or without the spectral fireworks. The water is always calm, the nights are clear, and if you’re alone it seems like you’re the only thing moving in the universe—and the whole world reacts to your every J-stroke. It all becomes resistanceless. Moments like this, with my head tilted back gazing up at the skyline, I can’t help but think of John Loechner. People outside the camp, the folks he knows in Ely, they call him Tacklebox. He’s been coming up here for years, used to take trips out here as a kid. He knows the people who run some of the big outfitters in town, and they’re like family he’s been around so much. One of the few guides who can come up in the summer without looking like a weekend warrior.
He was the first person I met when I got to camp. I was a day early and he was on the prep-crew. He’d just rammed the bank in a tiny forklift and dumped a pallet of dried milk into the dirt. He had that oh shit oh shit look on his face so I ran over and helped him lug these plastic wrapped bails of powder before he got caught.
We met like that and I didn’t quite know what to make of my man John at first. His head is a little long and he has a weird eye. I never know about guys with weird eyes, it’s like you can’t read them too well cause you don’t want to get caught staring at their eye, and if you are watching them you get distracted by the eye, forget to read them.
Loechner was there with me the night the Mothership went down. He’s been at base-camp on bait and tackle detail all summer, since he wrenched some shit in his shoulder on his first BWCA trip, dropped a seventy-five pound Alumacraft on his head, fell down under it. He told me he must’ve tripped on a root, but in my mind he’s dropping his battery-powered depth finder and gagging on it like Chaplin.
He gets all the gossip from off-water crews and fills me in when I’m back in camp. Told me a bunch of people in Ely saw it, someone called the Air Force and all that.
“Aw shoot, it was even in the paper. They think it was a satellite or something.”
“No fuckin satellite,” I said. “That thing was huge.”
“Everyone kept seeing helicopters up north of Basswood, and that kid Andy from Texas said he saw a campsite all burned out on Little Argo.”
“When was that?” I asked.
“Last week. It was still smoking.”
“Little Argo,” I said.
When you go to work at one of these Scout camps it’s like joining a militant cult: all this indoctrination, all the classic Jonestown elements, the repetition and preaching, routine enforcement, sleep deprivation, strict dress code. Me and Loechner went through it together. We probably sat through ten different one-hour “youth protection” classes. Like we didn’t know enough not to pork some little kid, like a VHS tape would stop some sick fuck anyway, but they’re relentless. There’s training sessions on everything, and they somehow recruit these veterans of the system, these twenty-year- olds from BYU, to do the systematic programming. These guys will stand up there for an hour and a half talking about the right way to stuff a Duluth pack, like it’s the sworn gospel.
They even teach you how to shit.
Well, this is Loechner’s second summer working here but he had to sit through all the training again, because that’s the way they do things here, and repetition is the cornerstone of any successful brainwashing scheme. Besides, one can never overemphasize the importance of covering your turds and avoiding the appearance of pederasty at all costs.
After a while, though, all that indoctrination is a bad joke, because you get out there on the lakes, twenty portages over the border, and these people you’re supposed to be fostering and guiding become so much baggage, and you start telling them just what you think of them. And I did slap that one kid, right on the face, but he was fucking with my food, and I told him I would smack the shit out of him if he did that again. He just looked at me with that smirk that said, “I’m a Junior Woodchuck, and I’m seventeen, and you can’t touch me because of youth protection guidelines,” and he jerked around with my trail mix so I gave him a full palm-punch across his smirk.
Later Skipper Steve (overpaid lawyer from Phoenix) was like, “Did you slap so and so?”
And I was like, “Yep.”
“Good," he said. He paused for a moment, didn’t smile, just said it again, “Good,” and walked off. He must’ve understood that I’d done the kid a favor. The boy’d been going around being a cock his whole life but no one ever bothered to let him know.
Loechner laughed when I told him about it later.
Now, coasting back and forth across the fluid borderline, I think about Loechner, and about Little Argo and the Mothership and all the antic weirdness in the sky up here. I think about ten- man war canoes three hundred years ago, skirmishes on these lakes; displaced New England tribes winning out with plundered black powder, aggression and succession banishing the petroglyph recipe to mystery. I bathe in the auroral downpour, locked on true north, until my neck aches and the paddle back to the campsite starts seeming like a long-overdue chore.
But this might not be a nice thing, the thing I’m doing with Loechner. It’s like saying to someone, “Here, I’m going to make your brain have a peculiar itch that you’ll never again be able to scratch.” Those lock-and-key transmitters in Loechner’s tweaky little noggin have never felt anything like this and he’s liable to like it.
It’s a nasty thing when you get right down to it, but unlike some sacraments, the upside to the Woodrose far exceeds the down. Though, for Loechner, it will be a curse, a lifetime of confused and jittery conversations with garden supply clerks and part-time greenhouse girls.
“African Albino Baby seeds, they’re like endangered or whatever, rare seeds, you know.”
“What does it look like?”
“I dunno, but the seeds taste like when you put your tongue on one of those square batteries, bad like pennies or something.”
“We’ve got African Violets?”
Honestly, I’m new to this particular regimen myself, not really sure if it’s a tough nut, or what. I do know that they get in you, the seeds, in your head, start getting religion in a weird way, thinking about it all the time, these metaphysical puzzles, obsessive riddles you pose to yourself with no verifiable answers. Constant reminders of how much you will never know.
Six semesters of existential philosophy and I never understood skepticism till I started swimming with the Woodrose. Even when you come down, even weeks later, there’s still that doubt—some plants prove there are two worlds, but the seeds, they make you wonder which one you belong to.
All I really know is that when I’m on the seeds I become someone else, Alfred P. Woodrose. This guy can see into the past, a thousand years, five, ten thousand, he can see people acting the way they did back when the world was going to last forever, before anyone figured out how to take it all apart.
Just after dawn Chem-Dad gets the Brads moving, hands each one a blister pack with some pseudoephedrine pill in it. That’s his thing, diphenhydramine at night, “for the bug bites,” and uppers in the morning for no discernable reason other than cranking them out.I can’t say much about it, and honestly, I force them each to eat two packs of dried cocoa with every breakfast no matter what we’re having, so I’m a co-conspirator.
I’m sitting on a log by the fire ring, whipping up a mess of cocoa-bannock flapjacks for the crew, mixing it in an aluminum pot on my lap, feeling good, singing my pancake song.
“At Saint Alfonso’s pancake breakfast ... where I stole the mar-ja- reen, and wheedled on the bingo cards and blew up the latrine ...”
Chem-Dad scrunches up his Dopey skeptical face and says, “Zappa?”
I raise an arched eyebrow and think, maybe this dude’s not so bad, I mean, if he speaks Zappanese, this trip might turn out.
Then he’s like, “Yeah, I saw Zappa once.”
“No shit?” This could be his moment of redemption.
“Yeah, 1975.”
“Far-out,” I say, and for about a second, since I’ve never met anyone with a first-hand Frank encounter to share, I’m mildly engaged by something Chem-Dad has to say.
“Where was that?”
“A sports arena in Milwaukee, Wisconsin.”
Oh shit, that’s great, Frank probably hated Milwaukee. If I was Zappa, I would hate Milwaukee all to fuck.
“Me and four of my frat buddies drove up from Champaign...”
At this point I stop listening. It pisses me off. Chem-Dad was the frat dude at the big Milwaukee stadium show. I hate the fuck out of that dude; Zappa hates the fuck out of that dude.
“Here’s your pancake,” I say.
After the seeds really take hold, and we smoke a few bowls, we decide to take the canoe out and paddle around the island. After we launch we go out a few rods then pull our paddles in and coast. As we drift away from the island we look up and gasp, trying to believe it, trying to make sense of what we’re seeing: a great arc with long spires of swirling white light shooting like butane flames at the sky’s dome. The lake is so glass, and the sky so cloudless that the whole scene is reflected on the waveless surface.
Loechner turns around, reaches out with his paddle, I tap it with mine in a kind of tacit high-five, a confirmation that he too can see this evening’s potential being fulfilled. We paddle on toward the northern tip of the small island with perfect, silent strokes, slicing a rhythm through the water with pure, frictionless viscosity—a sensation I’ve never felt, after going hundreds of miles on water. Like until this moment I’ve never truly understood the sublime, miraculous physics of paddling.
Halfway across the island I blink and in that flash of void I have a vision, in the glint of that second Loechner and I transmogrify into ancient Polynesians, the Alumacraft becomes a dugout, and we’re off on a sacred, shamanic imperative.
At the north end of the island we pull up, roll out my Indian blanket and lay still watching the sky. Seems like I’m floating in the middle of the lake, and all I can see is sky, no city lights for miles, and practically uninterrupted wilderness from here to Hudson’s Bay. We stare mutely for hours as the auroras stretch themselves into what looks like five red hands along the horizon, with long, rippling digits pointing to the center of the sky above us.
Loechner stands up with a motion that suggests urgency only by its contrast to the stillness around us. He rubs the skin of his arms, shudders, like he’s trying to brush off the invisible dew that’s settled on us.
“I’m cold,” he says.
“You can’t be cold,” I say. “You’re from Minnesota.”
His face looks confused and earnest like I’ve just given him an SAT verbal analogy problem. His weird eye drifts up a few degrees.
“No,” he says, “I’m cold. We should go.”
“You’re shittin me. Here, just wrap up in this thing.”
He pulls the Indian blanket around him like a red-striped cloak, stands gripping it with both fists under his chin. In no time he snaps out of it and squats down next to me, suddenly thawed.
And then I hear it, or rather, first I feel the concussion on my eardrums, then the sonic boom, two quick ones almost like when the shuttle lands down at Kennedy, but faster than that, ba-boom. We look up to see this thing, this orb, this sphere of electric plasma jagging northward, crackling in a synaesthetic streak. It fractures into fifths then explodes just as it disappears behind the tree line, leaving only yellow radiant vectors in the sky.
“Fission tracers,” I say, numbly, and it’s not really a term but that’s exactly what I’m seeing. Fission tracers.
The water in Darky Lake is red, almost like the tannic acid ponds down in Ocala with cypress trees leaking their blood all over, but this is different—blacker, mean-looking. Darky’s the last lake before Little Argo, so we’re all moving at a good clip, maybe three miles per hour. At the end of Darky we paddle into a cove and look for the portage head. As we get closer I notice the water clearing up, turning pink in the shallows at the edge.
Little Argo is really more of a creek than a lake. It’s about a mile long and W-shaped. It’s narrow, and there’s a slight current as clear water flows from Big Lake Argo to Darky. We cross the sixteen-rod portage quickly, efficiently with just two canoes. Somehow a crew with three canoes takes twice as long to do each portage, and if one thing is blessing this bunch it’s the fact that there weren’t more assholes on the bus. Despite the lack of sleep I’m feeling good this morning, and I don’t let them get to me. I owe them that much at least, since I let them sleep through the cinema last night.
As soon as we get past the first arm of Little Argo’s W, I smell the ash, more like the scent of welding sparks than a campfire, and I know now the rumor was true. Chem-Dad smells it too, does his Dopey, contemplative face. I pretend to act surprised when we come to the spot where the sole campsite on Little Argo is supposed to be, only to find it a scorched and desiccated acre.
We pull up to the rocky beach and everyone hops out in calf- deep water, dragging the bows up just enough that they won’t slide away in the current. I yank off my PFD and try to decipher the scene. What used to be a campsite is clear—a twisted, rubble fire pit at the center, several flat, sandy tent pads—but the destruction is uneven. Only half the trees are burnt. Some trees are only half- burnt. There are patches of fluffy, black ash just a couple feet away from untouched blueberry bushes, weeds still growing in a row between two clutches of downed, charred spruce trees. In places the ground seems to have been torn up from underneath, and the pattern is unclear, just random and disturbing. Looking closer I see what appears to be miniscule grains of singed mica emulsified into the cinders everywhere, like half a ton of burning metallic sand had been flung across the bank by God’s own hand.
The breeze blows a cinder mote to the corner of my eye, and while I flutter my lashes to get it out, in that stroboscopic nanosecond, I’m somewhere else. In a Woodrose flashback I see myself years and years ago, when I was much more like the Brads than I want to admit, then it’s gone, and the latticed sunlight cutting through the spruce tops brings me back to Little Argo.
Chem-Dad is sitting on a log, pulling his boots off and squeezing out his socks, the Brads are all running around, kicking up ash and trying to push over charred, dead-standing trees. When a cool wind blows through the creek they all get quiet and for a moment there’s a calm in the chill.
“I saw where a plane went down once,” I say. They all turn and look at me dumbly, tired. “Twice, actually, on the same mountain. This was when I was like sixteen. I was out on a trail crew, you know, we’d build trail for a couple weeks then go out hiking in the Sangre de Christos, and this one guy, the foreman, he knew where these crash sites were, and they weren’t on the map, you just had to know. So we hiked up to the first one, I remember it was the day after the 4th of July, and this was an old WWII crash, a big bomber or something, but there was just little pieces of debris, nothing big cause as soon as it happened the military came out with dozers and plowed straight up the mountainside and drug off the wreckage. Had all this radar stuff that was still like top-secret technology at the time, so there wasn’t much left.
“Anyway, about a day later the same foreman shows us this other place, but he just points the way and sort of hangs back on the trail. This crash was different, went down in like ’87 or ’88, and it was just some dude’s private plane that plowed into the mountain one night. The whole plane was there, just a mangled pile, and like, pieces hanging from the trees still, and people’s clothes. I remember there was some dude’s baseball cap all torn up, and someone mounted a little brass plaque on a tree trunk, had a couple names and all that.
“It was surprising at first. We were playing around, trying on the clothes and shit, but after a couple of minutes everybody got weird, sort of spooked, quiet. Didn’t feel right. It was sort of like this.”
“How is that like this at all?” says Chem-Dad, pulling his wet jungle boots back on.
“Jesus, dude. Can’t you see something went down out here?”
“Looks like someone’s campfire got loose to me.”
“Are you kidding me? Look, some of these trees got their tops broke off thirty feet up. And it’s the same over there.” I point to a corresponding ribbon of destruction on the other shore.
“I don’t know,” he says.
“Come on, man, look, a couple weeks ago there was a fucking campsite here, now it’s blasted.” I can’t tell them about the Mothership, and the black copters and the Woodrose. I want to tell them about the sonic boom echoing off the lake, making my cochlea tickle and itch, but I can’t. They wouldn’t get it, he’d call it a meteor, or space-junk, some skeptical test tube crap, and they’d know I drove them out here for this, not for the fucking pike. “Well, just think, what if your troop had come out a month ago? We coulda paddled out here and set up that night. Your tent would have been right there.” I point to a charred flat spot, a busted birch trunk lying half-burnt across it.
Dopey shrugs, turns those fucking palms up. Makes me wish there had been a riot at the Milwaukee show. He could have been crushed in an ecstatic stampede, become a Zappa martyr. Died with glory.
“All right. Saddle up,” I bark.
The closest campsite is two miles away on Big Lake Argo, so we have to paddle across Little Argo and do one last portage before we make camp. It’s three hundred rods into Big Argo but the Brads know better than to bitch about it by now. Chem-Dad looks duller than ever with this smudge of ash on his forehead that no one’s bothered telling him about, makes him look like the Catholic he no doubt is. But the rain clouds cleared overnight, and the sun is finally starting to dry things out as we make the portage.
I let them go ahead on the trail so that I can carry the last canoe, keep an eye on the stuff they drop or leave behind. I pullit on to dry land, then hoist it up so it’s balancing on my thighs. I rock it back and forth then give it a practiced nudge with my right knee, yoke it up onto my shoulders with a single motion. The portage is narrow and overgrown into a cave of low branches and mud puddles. With the canoe on my head I can only see what’s directly in front of my feet. At the end I wade into the water and let the boat roll off my shoulders. I look up, winded, and take the scene in. Big Argo is like a high-country Caribbean: blue-green water lapping up on white sandy beaches, wide, clear skies. I half-expect to see palm fronds drooping in the breeze. The Brads and Chem-Dad are sitting in the sand already, leaning against our bulging, inexpertly-stuffed Duluth packs, greeting the first real sun they’ve seen in days.
I grab a Nalgene bottle and take a long drink of iodine water. Chem-Dad pulls out a map and studies it while we rest for a minute.
“What’s that?” says Brad, pointing out to the middle of Big Argo.
“Whoa, is that a moose?” says the other Brad.
I look out and see something big swimming across the lake to a small island a couple hundred yards away. For a minute I think it’s a moose too, then I realize it’s not.
“Black bear,” I say.
Chem-Dad looks up from his map doubtfully. When it gets to the island it saunters up on four legs and shakes off like a dog.
“Black bear,” I say again.
Chem-Dad peers at me over the map, awaiting an especially obnoxious snub, but I don’t give him the honor.
“Know what? Let’s do lunch here,” I say
Paddling back from the island at sunrise we move quickly but manage to keep our shafts off the gunwales. We haven’t said a word in hours and I don’t know what you could say. We both fear, I think, that if we talk about what we saw it will somehow make real certain possibilities we don’t have the capacity to deal with just yet. We move across the lake under a pastel sky with an impression of coral colors so subtle they seem almost fake, like the confusing colors of the restored Sistine Chapel— unreal, impossible colors. All around us morning mosquitoes crosshatch the air, sewing reality together with random, interlocking orbits. We’re lost in the low-lying fog yet we paddle right up to the landing at the Scout camp on instinct of dead reckoning.
On our way to the campsite I take the crew on a detour into a narrow, steep-walled cove.
“Where we going?” asks Chem-Dad.
“There’s some petroglyphs down here.”
“Not on the map,” he says.
I ignore him.
“Can’t we just get to the campsite?” he says.
“Would you shut up and paddle?
One of the Brads, an actual Brad, tries unsuccessfully to squelch his amusement at the abuse his dad has to pretty much take from me.
At the north end of the cove, on a flat wall of overhanging rock is a long graffiti of red marks, most of them too weathered to decipher, but in the middle, one dark set stands out: five bloody hands smeared down the rock face, stretched, about seven feet above the water line. I paddle up to the rock and stand in the canoe, which you’re never supposed to do, then I reach all the way up and lay an illegal hand on the longest palm print. Feels warm. Sunlight glaring off the water blinds me and for a second I see someone a thousand years ago, with a long head and a weird eye, mixing rust and piss and bear fat, crushing some long-extinct red seeds. In that second I feel like my nightmares are more intuition than dream.

On March 2, 2019, at 0918 eastern standard time, an experimental, amateur-built Kitfox XL4, N93XL, was substantially damaged when it impacted Sykes Creek during an aborted landing at the Merritt Island Airport (COI), Merritt Island, Florida. The commercial pilot was seriously injured. The airplane was registered to and operated by the pilot under the provisions of Title 14 Code of Federal Regulations Part 91. Visual meteorological conditions prevailed, and no flight plan was filed for the local personal flight that originated at COI.
A witness was fishing on his boat when he first observed the airplane. He said the airplane bounced while landing and then climbed about 15 to 25 ft before making a sharp right bank. The airplane then crashed nose first into the creek.
Another witness, who was a flight instructor, observed the accident from an airplane on the hold short line for runway 29. He saw the accident airplane turn onto the final approach leg of the traffic pattern and make a stable approach to the runway. The flight instructor turned away for a moment, but when he looked back up, the airplane was in a 90 right bank flying perpendicular to the runway. The right wingtip was about 10 ft from the ground as the airplane veered toward the water. The right-wing tip struck the water first, which resulted in the nose of the airplane pitching down under the water and submerging the cabin.
The airplane sustained damage to both wing tips, the fuselage and the propeller.
The pilot held a commercial pilot certificate with a rating for airplane single-engine land. His last Federal Aviation Administration (FAA) third-class medical certificate was issued on March 22, 2010.
Weather reported at Patrick Air Force Base, Cocoa Beach, Florida, about 9 miles southeast of the accident site, at 0856, was wind 250 at 4 knots, visibility 10 miles, clear skies, temperature 23, dew point 21, and an altimeter setting of 30.14 inches of mercury .

Category	Data	Category	Data	Category	Data
Event Id:	20190302X03307	Investigation Type:	Accident	Accident Number:	ERA19LA114
Event Date:	03/02/2019	Location:	Merritt Island, FL	Country:	United States
Latitude:	28.341389	Longitude:	-80.685277	Airport Code:	COI
Airport Name:	Merritt Island	Injury Severity:	Non-Fatal	Aircraft Damage:	Substantial
Aircraft Category:	Airplane	Registration Number:	N93XL	Make:	REMPE
Model:	KITFOX	Amateur Built:	Yes	Number of Engines:	1
Engine Type:	Reciprocating	FAR Description:	Part 91: General Aviation	Schedule:
Purpose of Flight:	Personal	Air Carrier:		Total Fatal Injuries:
Total Serious Injuries:	1	Total Minor Injuries:		Total Uninjured:
Weather Condition:	VMC	Broad Phase of Flight:	LANDING	Report Status:	Preliminary
Publication Date:	03/14/2019

http://www.ntsb.gov/_layouts/ntsb.aviation/brief.aspx?ev_id=20190302X03307

[Daily Breeze has the following events listed:] They have nothing as of 2 pm
South Bay By Jackie has the following events listed:
Vroom, vroom! The Cruise is back! Cruise at the Beach returns to Ruby’s Diner in Redondo Beach for the season on April 17! Open to the public, this free event happens every Friday night through October and features a gathering of vintage automobiles on display in the Ruby’s Diner parking lot from 4 to 8 p.m. Enthusiasts are encouraged to bring their hot rods, street rods and muscle cars and strut their stuff. A favorite with local car enthusiasts, this popular event has grown tremendously over the years and features vintage and classic cars from all over Southern California. The evening also features music, trivia, trophies and raffle. Ruby’s Diner is located at 245 North Harbor Drive in Redondo Beach. If you wish to display a car or require more information, contact Larry Neville at 310-962-7438.
The Circle presents the 2015 Homes Tour: Behind the Gates of Rolling Hills, on Friday, April 17 and Saturday, April 18. The homes presented range from an historic equestrian retreat to a totally re-envisioned 1950′s entertainment paradise. The owners are just as diverse, including among them an Academy Award winner and classic car collectors. Take a break from touring the beautiful homes and enjoy a luncheon by TGIS at the stylish Stripe Café in the Palos Verdes Art Center. Guests may also enter a raffle for a chance to win one or more extraordinary prizes. Prizes include a Week in Sedona Package, Hollywood Bowl Package, Sports Lover Package, jewelry, art, goods and services. The drawing will be held on Saturday, April 18 at 4 p.m. at PVAC. In addition, attendees may place a bid on an original oil painting commissioned expressly for the Palos Verdes Homes Tour, painted by Don Crocker. General admission tickets for the homes tour are $50 per person or $45 for PVAC members. The hours are 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. on both days and guests will be shuttled to the Tour Homes and back to the Art Center. Parking will be available at the PV Art Center and the Peninsula Community Church (300 yards further up the same side of the street). There are no cameras, pets, food, children under 12, large bags or high-heeled shoes allowed and the homes are not handicapped accessible. For additional information, visit the website at http://www.pvhomestour.org/. The Palos Verdes Art Center is located at 5504 Crestridge Road in Rancho Palos Verdes. Volunteers will be on site to direct guests to the Shuttles to the three tour homes.
The 2015 Universe Multicultural Film Festival (UMFF) takes place from April 17 to April 19 in Rolling Hills Estates. The screenings will be held at the Promenade on the Peninsula, RHCC Community Center and Peninsula Center Library in Rolling Hills Estates. The festival offers an amazing opportunity to learn about different cultures, lifestyles, traditions and beliefs. UMFF will screen more than 75 feature films and short films representing twenty five countries, along with special artist tributes, conversations, panels, education programs and a special cultural fashion show on Sunday afternoon. All the screened films will be either voiced in English or contain subtitles. General admission tickets are $5 for children 18 and under and $10 for adults. Family, group and day passes are also available. The festival invites the community to attend and take part in additional activities such as industry panels and cultural events. The film committee will host high-quality events for participants and collaborators, including film receptions, galas, award ceremony and specific seminars with directors and filmmakers looking for new projects. For additional information, schedule and a list of films, visit the website at http://www.umfilms.org.
The business owners of Downtown Manhattan Beach are hosting their Spring Sidewalk Sale from Friday, April 17 through Sunday, April 19. For three days, shoppers can take advantage of drastic price reductions on merchandise ranging from clothing to home furnishings and everything in between. Enjoy massive retail markdowns, pleasant outdoor dining, beautiful weather, convenient parking and glorious ocean views. Regular store and restaurant hours will be in effect. Visit the Downtown Manhattan Beach Facebook page for special offers and pre-sale events. “CHECK-IN”, post a “SELFIE” of your shopping/dining experience, tell them about the deal you found, and tag #MYDTMB. For additional details, visit the website at http://www.downtownmanhattanbeach.com/.
The public is invited to join the Beach Cities Cycling Club and special guest Anthony Kennedy-Shriver of Best Buddies International, for a Bike Ride on April 18 to promote the Special Olympics World Games, founded by his mother, Eunice Kennedy-Shriver. Anthony will recognize the good work both organizations do to improve the lives of people with intellectual disabilities and honor the South Bay Host Towns for their support of hundreds of International Special Olympics athletes and coaches. The BCCClub will offer four FREE non-competitive, local bike rides of varying distances to choose from. The rides will have a staggered start (8:00 to 8:45 AM) leaving from the Redondo Beach Pier area, near the bike path. During the rides, attendees will have a chance to talk with Anthony Kennedy-Shriver and learn more about Best Buddies, in addition to meeting Coach Jim Hannon, BCCClub/B-4 Team Captain. Following the bike ride, Best Buddies will provide food, coffee, giveaways, prizes and more. For additional information and to register for the bike ride, visit the website at http://bccclub.org/BCCClub-BB.html. To learn more about the Best Buddies organization, join the B-4/BCCClub Team and ride in the Hearst Castle Challenge, or make a donation, visit the website at http://bestbuddieschallenge.org/hc/. More questions? Contact Kelly Schultz at [email protected] or Jim Hannon at [email protected].
Here’s a new twist on how to get ready for summer! King Harbor Brewery presents Girls Pint Out on Saturday, April 18 between 5 and 8 p.m. Birdie Fashion on the Fly, a mobile boutique shop will be setting up shop for those that are looking for a new spring outfit. The Nail Truck, an Orange County based mobile nail salon will also be offering professional manicures, pedicures and gels on board a chic vintage airstream. For those interested in booking an appointment please call or text Janine at (949) 294-6902. Walk-ins will also be available. This event is free to attend and open to all ages, even the boys! Beer will also be available for purchase. Guests who either purchase an item from Birdie Fashion on the Fly, or receive a mani or pedi (this includes the guys!) from The Nail Truck, will receive $1 off the Swirly, an American Brown Ale with Coffee, Vanilla and Cocoa Nibs along with a raffle ticket to win a gift bag full of goodies including nail polish, jewelry, and King Harbor Brewery swag. Come out and get girly with the ‘Swirly’! For additional information, visit the website at http://kingharborbrewing.com/. King Harbor Brewing Company is located at 2907 182 Street in Redondo Beach.
The City of Torrance Community Services Department and The Attic invite the public to celebrate the Attic’s 16 Year Anniversary with an all you can eat Pancake Breakfast on Saturday, April 18 from 7 to 11 a.m. Guests will enjoy live entertainment and tours of the facility will be available. Donations are $5 per person and will be used to upgrade the patio area and outdoor recreational area. Tickets are now on sale at The Attic, the City of Torrance Community Services Department Information Desk or from any Attic Advisory Committee/Torrance Youth Council representative. For additional information, call (310) 618-2930. The Attic is located at 2320 West Carson Street in Torrance.
El Segundo Museum of Art hosts Amanda Yates Garcia: The Oracle of Los Angeles, for a lecture about living life as a real witch on Saturday, April 18 from 6:30 to 9 p.m. Yates Garcia is a multi-media artist, writer, oracle and witch. Along with a lecture on contemporary witchcraft, Yates Garcia will offer a Manifestation ritual in honor of the New Moon and the rejuvenating potential of springtime. The event and lecture is part of ESMoA’s current art experience, SPARK, which looks deep into Mirrorworld, a collection of illustrated stories from bestselling children’s author Cornelia Funke, to examine the connection between inspiration and imagination in our high-tech, high-finance, high-art-priced age. Sounds like an enchanting evening…. For additional information, visit the ESMoA website at http://www.ESMoA.org or call 424-277-1020. ESMoA is located at 208 Main Street in El Segundo.
Chalk it up on Saturday, April 18 at the fifth annual Earth Day Chalk Art Challenge at the Redondo Marina sponsored by the King Harbor Association beginning at 10 a.m. This free event provides a public space for professional artists, children and festival-goers to make and enjoy chalk art murals. Participants of all levels are invited to create a chalk art drawing to commemorate Earth Day. The first 100 children to sign-up on the day of the event will receive free chalk. This free event is open to public viewing so even if you don’t plan to participate, take a stroll along the ocean front and discover what these amazing artists can create with a slab of concrete and a little chalk! All the fun takes place at the Redondo Beach Marina Sea Wall located at 181 North Harbor Drive in Redondo Beach. For additional information, call 310-374-3481 or visit the Facebook page at https://www.facebook.com/events/364049703786507/.
The El Segundo Public Library presents the new season of the popular Concerts in the Library series which runs from January through May. This free series is open to the public and features classical and jazz programs, as well as music from different ethnic traditions. The concerts take place in the Friends of the Library Room on the third Saturday of each month at 2 p.m. and will include light refreshments provided by the Friends of the Library. This Saturday, April 18 features the music of the Joel Irish Trio. The El Segundo Public Library is located at 111 West Mariposa Avenue in El Segundo. For a complete list of shows and other information, call 310-524-2728 or visit the website at http://www.elsegundo.org/library/.
The Palos Verdes Junior Women’s Club presents Cirque Du Soiree – A Whimsical Night of Amazing Delights in the Grand Ballroom of the Manhattan Beach Marriot on Saturday, April 18. The evening will feature dinner, dancing, entertainment and silent and live auctions. The event runs from 6 p.m. to midnight and benefits local philanthropies supported by the Palos Verdes Junior Women’s Club. Tickets are $185 per person if purchased by March 18 and $200 per person afterward. For additional information and ticket purchase, visit the website at http://www.pvjuniors.org/. The Manhattan Beach Marriott is located at 1400 Parkview Avenue in Manhattan Beach.
This is so cool….The public is invited to attend the Opening Reception: South Bay Snapshots at Phantom Galleries L.A. in Hawthorne on Sunday, April 19 from 4 to 8 p.m. Phantom Galleries L.A. revitalizes and energizes communities and pedestrian thoroughfares by transforming unoccupied properties throughout Los Angeles County into vibrant cultural hubs with the 24/7 public presentation of art. Daily life in the South Bay is uniquely revealed by photographers Melissa Richardson Banks, Jon Berry, Arlene P. Carley and Richard Podgurski. Curated by Martha De Perez and hosted by Liza Simone of Phantom Galleries L.A., this exhibit is a featured event of Month of Photography Los Angeles (MOPLA) presented by the Lucie Foundation. RSVP on Eventbrite at https://southbaysnapshots2015.eventbrite.com/ and you may win a FREE 8″ unframed print! For additional information and to RSVP, visit the Facebook page at https://www.facebook.com/events/1032391666775015/. Phantom Galleries L.A. is located at 12609 Hawthorne Boulevard in Hawthorne.
Temple Beth El Sisterhood presents the Sun-Dappled Garden Tour on Sunday, April 19. Guests are invited to tour six extraordinary water-wise, private gardens from 10:30 a.m. to 4:30 p.m. on the Palos Verdes peninsula. In addition, lunch will be served at the outdoor café of a seventh garden between 11:30 and 2 p.m. Tickets purchased before April 12 are $39 each and $44 thereafter. For additional information and to make reservations, contact Sandy at 310-377-3043 or by email at [email protected].
If you know of anything else going down this weekend, let us know in the comments. Have a fun and safe weekend!